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More Jokes

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    Abstract Noun

    "An abstract noun," the teacher said, "is something you can think of, but you can't touch…
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    Shopping Plan

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    Accounting Secret

    There was once an accounting firm where the senior CPA knew everything there was to know…
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    Mouse Trap

    A woman rushes into a hardware store and said, "Can I have a mouse trap, please? And will…
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    Ask Jeeves

    My 50-something friend Nancy and I decided to introduce her mother to the magic of the…
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    Market Conditions

    The stockbroker's secretary answered his phone one morning. "I'm sorry," she said, "Mr.…
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    Miscellaneous Goobers

    GOOBERS AT WORK - I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk…
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    Important Political Decisions

    As a recent high-school graduate, I traveled to our state capitol and got to visit the…
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    Tired Son

    A clergyman, walking down a country lane, sees a young farmer struggling to load hay back…
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    Cake Make Up

    On Coast Guard cutters, low-ranking crewmembers take turns in the galley helping the…
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    Hair Mission

    In dire need of a beauty make-over, I went to my salon with a fashion magazine photo of a…
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    New Librarian

    The new librarian decided that instead of checking out children's books by writing the…
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    Drag Racing Moped

    A hip young man goes out and buys the best car available: a 2005 Turbo Z123DX. It is the…
  • violin

    The Violin

    Little Hope was practicing the violin in the living room while her father was trying to…
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    Science Quotes from Kids - Part 1

    ~ One horsepower is the amount of energy it takes to drag a horse 500 feet in one…

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: What are your green fees?

Staff: 38 dollars.

Caller: Does that include golf?

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, I need to get some information from you. First, is this your correct phone number?

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, we have a tee time for two weeks from Friday. What's the weather going to be like that day?

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, I had a tee time for this afternoon but I'm running late. Can you still get me out early?

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, do you have one of those areas where you can buy a bucket of golf balls and hit them for practice?

Staff: You mean a driving range?

Caller: No, that's not it..,,,

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, I'd like to get a tee time tomorrow between 12 O'clock and noon.

Staff: Between 12 o'clock and noon?

Caller: Yes.

Staff: We'll try to squeeze you in.

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Do you have any open tee times around 10 o'clock?

Staff: Yes, we have one at 10:15.

Caller: What's the next time after that?

Staff: We have one at 10:22.

Caller: We'll take that one. It will be a bit warmer.

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: How much to play golf today?

Staff: 25 to walk, 38 with a cart.

Caller: 38 dollars?

Staff: No, 38 yen.

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: What do you have for tee times tomorrow?

Staff: What time would you like?

Caller: What times do you have?

Staff: What time of the day?

Caller: Any time.

Staff: Morning or afternoon?

Caller: Whenever.

Staff: We have 16 times open in the morning and 20 open in the afternoon. Would you like me to read the whole list?

Caller: No, I don't think any of those times will work for me.

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Do you have a dress code?

Staff: Yes, we do. We require soft spikes.

Caller: How about clothes?

Staff: Yes, you have to wear clothes.

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, do you have a driving range there?

Staff: Yes.

Caller: How much for a bucket of large balls?

Staff: Sorry, we're all out of large balls. But we can give you twice as many small balls for the same price.

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Can I get a tee time for tomorrow?

Staff: Sure, what time would you like?

Caller: Something between 9 o'clock and 10 o'clock. In the morning, if possible.

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Do you rent golf clubs there?

Staff: Yes, they're 25 dollars.

Caller: How much to rent a bag?

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, my husband just called me on his cell phone and told me he's on the 15th hole, How many more holes does he have to play before he gets to the 18th?

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, do you have a driving range there?

Staff: Yes.

Caller: How much for a large bucket?

Staff: Four dollars.

Caller: Does that include the balls?

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Do you have a twilight rate?

Staff: Yes, it's 15 dollars after 2 o'clock.

Caller: And what time does that start?

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, I'd like some info about your golf course.

Staff: OK, what would you like to know?

Caller: I don't know, that's why I called.

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: My kids just came home with pockets full of range balls and said they stole them from your driving range Would you like to buy them back?

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