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    Hair Mission

    In dire need of a beauty make-over, I went to my salon with a fashion magazine photo of a…
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    Vet Come Back

    Dr. Cutter is the local veterinarian in Kennebec County, Maine. He was well-known in town…
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    Sewing Lesson

    My granddaughter came to spend a few weeks with me, and I decided to teach her to…
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    Fish Heads

    A customer at Green's Gourmet Grocery marveled at the proprietor's quick wit and…
  • woman old3

    Not Going to Church

    One Sunday morning, a mother knocks on her son's bedroom door and tells him it's time to…
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    Razor Request

    Ronnie goes down to the barber shop. He gets his hair cut and then he is getting a shave.…
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    Memory Improvement

    I knew that as I was getting older, and finally able to admit it, certain things were…
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    Missing Church

    Two men were fishing on a lake, feeling guilty that it was a Sunday morning, that they…
  • man sleeping1

    Visiting Friends

    Hush-A-Bye Buddy (Modified from Rock-A-Bye Baby) Hush-A-Bye BuddyIn our guest roomIt's…
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    Makeup Routine

    Every morning, a little girl would go in the bathroom to watch Mommy as she was putting…
  • cowboy

    Texas Cruise

    A Texas rancher, visiting a South Dakota farmer friend, asked him to show him his farm.…
  • university building

    Battle Hymn of Term Finals

    Mine eyes have seen the horrorOf the ending of the termIt has poisoned all my spiritsLike…
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    Goober Mirror

    Two goobers, Carol and Patty, were walking down the street.Carol noticed a compact on the…
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    Cats

    "There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast.""In a cat's eye, all things…
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    Bar Room Houdini

    A deputy police officer responded to a report of a barroom disturbance. The "disturbance"…

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: What are your green fees?

Staff: 38 dollars.

Caller: Does that include golf?

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, I need to get some information from you. First, is this your correct phone number?

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, we have a tee time for two weeks from Friday. What's the weather going to be like that day?

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, I had a tee time for this afternoon but I'm running late. Can you still get me out early?

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, do you have one of those areas where you can buy a bucket of golf balls and hit them for practice?

Staff: You mean a driving range?

Caller: No, that's not it..,,,

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, I'd like to get a tee time tomorrow between 12 O'clock and noon.

Staff: Between 12 o'clock and noon?

Caller: Yes.

Staff: We'll try to squeeze you in.

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Do you have any open tee times around 10 o'clock?

Staff: Yes, we have one at 10:15.

Caller: What's the next time after that?

Staff: We have one at 10:22.

Caller: We'll take that one. It will be a bit warmer.

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: How much to play golf today?

Staff: 25 to walk, 38 with a cart.

Caller: 38 dollars?

Staff: No, 38 yen.

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: What do you have for tee times tomorrow?

Staff: What time would you like?

Caller: What times do you have?

Staff: What time of the day?

Caller: Any time.

Staff: Morning or afternoon?

Caller: Whenever.

Staff: We have 16 times open in the morning and 20 open in the afternoon. Would you like me to read the whole list?

Caller: No, I don't think any of those times will work for me.

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Do you have a dress code?

Staff: Yes, we do. We require soft spikes.

Caller: How about clothes?

Staff: Yes, you have to wear clothes.

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, do you have a driving range there?

Staff: Yes.

Caller: How much for a bucket of large balls?

Staff: Sorry, we're all out of large balls. But we can give you twice as many small balls for the same price.

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Can I get a tee time for tomorrow?

Staff: Sure, what time would you like?

Caller: Something between 9 o'clock and 10 o'clock. In the morning, if possible.

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Do you rent golf clubs there?

Staff: Yes, they're 25 dollars.

Caller: How much to rent a bag?

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, my husband just called me on his cell phone and told me he's on the 15th hole, How many more holes does he have to play before he gets to the 18th?

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, do you have a driving range there?

Staff: Yes.

Caller: How much for a large bucket?

Staff: Four dollars.

Caller: Does that include the balls?

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Do you have a twilight rate?

Staff: Yes, it's 15 dollars after 2 o'clock.

Caller: And what time does that start?

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, I'd like some info about your golf course.

Staff: OK, what would you like to know?

Caller: I don't know, that's why I called.

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Staff: Golf course, may I help you?

Caller: My kids just came home with pockets full of range balls and said they stole them from your driving range Would you like to buy them back?

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