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More Jokes

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    Trio of Puns

    Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became a famous…
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    Successful Ice Fishing

    Two men have been sitting out on a lake all day long ice fishing. One has been having no…
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    The ABC Song

    Customer: “Hey, can you help me find this book?” Me: “Sure.” (He holds up a piece of…
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    Wakeup Fight

    Following an especially angry argument, Mr. and Mrs. Smith went to bed not speaking to…
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    Cat Sitting

    One night while I was cat-sitting my daughter's indoor feline, it escaped outside. When…
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    Diary

    Linda: "What's that you're reading?"Jill: "A diary."Linda: What's in it?Jill: "I can't…
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    Romantic Switch

    Although he had packed his bag for a business trip the night before, my husband planned…
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    Signs The Car You Bought Is A Lemon

    1. As you leave the used car lot, you see the owner rush out with a gigantic smile and…
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    Breathe

    A lady on a commuter train was reading a newspaper article about life and death…
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    Coffee Delivery

    The young clerk's responsibilities included bringing the judge a hot cup of coffee at the…
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    Mom's Phone

    Because my mother had a habit of losing her cordless phone, I bought her a phone with a…
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    Politcal Quotes

    "I resent your insinuendoes." "If we don't make some changes, the status quo will remain…
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    Favorite Candy

    Our phone rang late one night, and my wife Nancy picked it up. She said, "KitKat," and…
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    Little Johnny's Bike

    Little Johnny was one of those holy terrors. His dad was surprised when Johnny's mom…
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    Office Dog

    A salesman dropped in to see a business customer. Not a soul was in the office except a…

A group of golfers were telling tall stories. At last came a veteran's turn. "Well," he said, "I once drove a ball, accidentally off course, through a cottage window. The ball knocked over an oil lamp and the place caught on fire!"

"What did you do?" asked his friends.

"Oh," said the veteran, "I immediately teed up another ball, took careful aim, and hit the fire alarm on Main Street. That brought out the fire engine before any major damage was done."

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