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    Three Important Words

    At my granddaughter's wedding, the DJ polled the guests to see who had been married…
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    Jack's Will

    Jack has died. His lawyer is standing before the family and reads out Jack's last will…
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    Great Writing

    There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great…
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    A Great Job

    A guy came home to his wife and said, "Guess what? I've found a great job. A 10 a.m.…
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    Art Good News/Bad News

    An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings on…
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    Battery Life

    An angry motorist went back to a garage where he had purchased an expensive battery for…
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    Circle Stand

    Ron just got a new sports car and was out for a drive when he cut off a truck driver. The…
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    Houdini Wannabe

    A deputy police officer responded to a report of a barroom disturbance. The "disturbance"…
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    D.C. Flyover

    On a recent trip to Washington, D.C., my brother-in-law overheard a patriotic father…
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    Lost Gas Cap

    David filled his car with gas at a self-service gas station. After he had paid and driven…
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    Photo Apology

    Photographer Ruth Van Bergen specialized in celebrity portraits. One wealthy woman…
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    Tie Conspiracy

    At a clearance sale, the wife of a federal district court judge found a green tie that…
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    Coin Test

    During class, the chemistry professor was demonstrating the properties of various acids.…
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    Grandpa's Manners

    "Grandpa, I'm really proud of you," said the modish young lady. "What's to be proud of?"…
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    Pierced Ears

    The students in my third-grade class were bombarding me with questions about my newly…

Two goobers, Carol and Patty, were walking down the street.

Carol noticed a compact on the sidewalk and leaned down to pick it up.

She opened it, looked in the mirror and said, "Hmmm, this person looks familiar."

Patty said, "Let me look!"  So, Carol handed her the compact.

Patty looked in the mirror and said, "You goober, it's me!"

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