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More Jokes

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    Scavenger Hunt

    A woman answered her front door and saw a little boy holding a list. "Ma'am," he…
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    Flight Instructions

    During a business trip to Boeing's Everett, Washington factory, I noticed several 747 and…
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    Subway Drop

    The Manhattan Commuter train was packed. Suddenly there was a jingle on the floor. Most…
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    Shovel Need

    One morning a local highway department crew reaches their job-site and realizes they have…
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    Flood Prediction

    Meteorological experts predicted a massive flood that would destroy the world.The Pope…
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    Grandfather Putt

    Playing golf with his buddies, my grandfather had to make a slick 45-foot, downhill putt.…
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    Ten Ways You Know Your Internet Connection Is A Little Slow

    Ten Ways You Know Your Internet Connection Is A Little Slow1. Text on Web pages displays…
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    Fathering

    A man speaks frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are…
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    Cherokee 180

    One day, the pilot of a Cherokee 180 was told by the tower to hold short of the active…
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    Failing Eyesight

    An older lady was expecting a gentleman friend to call on her later in the day. She was…
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    Chicken Answers

    Before you get to today‚Äôs supersized CleanLaugh, a bit down this e-mail (post number…
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    I'm a Moth

    A man walks into a dentist's surgery and says, "Excuse me, can you help me. I think I'm a…
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    Art Interpretation

    Liz goes to her first show at an art gallery and is looking at the paintings. One is a…
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    Time Management

    The church wanted to help their congregation cope better with the stresses of modern…
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    Football Signals

    A three-year-old in the congregation regularly watched football games with his father. So…

I got some bad news today. You know the money you get from those ATM machines? It comes from *your* account!
Sharon Grubb

I don't care how much you and your cat love each other, if you were one inch smaller than the sweet little kitty, he'd eat you in a heartbeat.
Tom Gard

I'm really glad the guy who invented the Ray Gun was named Ray. Being shot with a Fred gun just wouldn't sound as cool.
Bob Neanover

If you sat a million monkeys down at a million computers, they might just fix this Y2K problem...oh wait, we're already doing that.
Darrell Hulshult

I think that someone must have surveillance equipment set up in my living room, because every once in a while, someone on the TV will tell me what channel I'm watching. That really freaks me out, you know?
Pam Stewart

My doctor tells me I suffer from extreme hypochondria. He prescribed a strong placebo, but I don't think it's working.
Fred Marcum

I'd always wondered what it would be like to live on the sun, until my mother-in-law suggested that pressing my face against a hot frying pan might give me an idea. Trust me, you *don't* want to move there.
Ted Moran

Why are aliens always portrayed as evil in movies? How do we know that there isn't an alien out there just waiting to share the recipe for "The Universe's Best Waffle Mix?"
Kevin Peck

Light sabers don't kill people. Jedis kill people.
Jim Clark

I'll bet the first convenience stores were nothing more than caves where you could buy sticks and rocks and microwave burritos.
Art Bugsch

Word to the Empire: The Death Star is impressive, but just be sure your maps are current.
Mike Weinhold

They say if you build a better mouse trap, the world will beat down your door. But usually, it's just one neighbor, and he'll probably quit once you stop throwing dead mice in his yard.
Don Giuliano

If I had to choose one incident that sparked my love, study, and eventual career in astronomy, it would be the first time I saw a picture of that planet-you know, the one with those neat space-rings around it.
Steve Patt

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