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    Ice Capades

    A mother's four-year-old daughter was attending her first performance of the Ice Capades.…
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    Owed to Spell Checquer

    OWED TO SPELL CHECQUER Eye halve a spelling chequerIt came with my pea seaIt plainly…
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    Overdue Rent

    Walpole had lived in his loft for six months, and by now it was filled with the paintings…
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    Incapacitated

    I was recovering from surgery when a charity representative phoned asking me to take part…
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    More Musings

    What happens if you get scared half to death twice?Energizer Bunny arrested -- charged…
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    Campaign Funding

    Can you believe a candidate dropped out of the race because of a lack of campaign funds?…
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    Waking Up Grumpy

    A marriage counsellor was attempting to find out something about his patient's attitude…
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    Order Debt

    A customer sent an order to a distributor for a large amount of goods totaling a great…
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    Cooking Terms

    Tongue: A variety of meat, rarely served because it clearly crosses the line between a…
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    Politically Correct Statements for a New Century

    Your bedroom isn't cluttered, it's just "passage restrictive." Kids don't get grounded…
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    Matching Shoes

    John and Nancy were married for 40 years and decided they wanted to renew their vows and…
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    Things It Takes Most Of Us 50 Years To Learn

    1. The badness of a movie is directly proportional to the number of helicopters in it.2.…
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    Movie Impatience

    We went to the movie the other night. I sat in an aisle seat as I usually do because it…
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    12 Reasons to be Thankful You Burned the Turkey

    1. Salmonella won't be a concern. 2. Everyone will think your turkey is Cajun blackened.…
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    Serious Shopper

    I was browsing in a souvenir shop when the man next to me struck up a conversation. Just…

A recent bride called her mother one evening in tears. "Oh, Mom, I tried to make Grandmother's meat loaf for dinner tonight, and it's just awful! I followed the recipe exactly, and I know I have the recipe right because it's the one you gave me. But it just didn't come out right, and I'm so upset. I wanted this to be so special for George because he loves meat loaf. What could have gone wrong?"

Her mother replied soothingly, "Well, dear, let's go through the recipe. You read it out loud and tell me exactly what you did at each step, and together we'll figure it out."

"OK," the bride sniffled. "Well, it starts out, 'Take fifty cents worth of ground beef' ..."

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