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  • new years_eve

    Attainable New Year's Resolutions

    This year, I resolve to... - Gain weight; at least 30 pounds. - Stop exercising; waste of…
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    Next Pastor

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    For Charlotte

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  • bus interior

    Bus Pole

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    Goober Ice Fishing

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    Dun in Texas

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    Wedding Dress Blues

    When my sister Andrea got married, she asked to wear my mother's wedding dress. The day…
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    Special Delivery

    It was 6 p.m., and I was about to leave the coin laundry where I was employed. My boss…
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    Fax Hint

    As a professor at the Air Force Institute of Technology, I taught a series of popular…
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    Duck Food

    Duck : Do you have any duck food? Storekeeper: No Duck : Do you have any duck food?…
  • cat on roof

    Your Cat's New Year's Resolutions

    My human will never let me eat their pet hamster, and I am at peace with that. I will not…
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    Walk-in Scream

    A woman went to a walk-in clinic, where she was seen by a young, new doctor. After about…
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    Hymns for Speeders

    Now, for those who speed on the highway - a few hymns for you: 45 mph.................God…
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    Ten for Sure

    My friend, the manager of a grocery store, nabbed a shoplifter in the act. He was…
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    Dayvorce

    A farmer walked into an attorney's office wanting to file for a divorce.The attorney…
Bob Hill and his new wife, Betty, were vacationing in Europe -- as it happens, in Transylvania. They were driving a rental car along a rather deserted highway. It was late, and raining very hard. Bob could barely see 10 feet in front of the car. Suddenly the car skids out of control! Bob attempts to control the car, but to no avail! The car swerves and smashes into a tree.

Moments later, Bob shakes his head to clear the fog. Dazed, he looks over at the passenger seat and sees his new wife unconscious, with her head bleeding! Despite the rain and unfamiliar countryside, Bob knows he has to carry her to the nearest phone. Bob carefully picks his wife up and begins trudging down the road.

After a short while, he sees a light. He heads towards the light, which is coming from an old, large house. He approaches the door and knocks.

A minute passes. A small, hunched man opens the door. Bob immediately blurts, "Hello, my name is Bob Hill, and this is my wife, Betty. We've been in a terrible accident, and my wife has been seriously hurt. Can I please use your phone??"

"I'm sorry," replies the hunchback, "but we don't have a phone. My master is a doctor. Come in and I will get him."

Bob brings his wife in. An elegant man comes down the stairs. "I'm afraid my assistant may have misled you. I am not a medical doctor. I am a scientist.

However, it is many miles to the nearest clinic, and I have had basic medical training.

With that, Igor picks up Betty and carries her downstairs, with Bob following closely. Igor places Betty on a table in the lab.

Bob collapses from exhaustion and his own injuries; so Igor places Bob on an adjoining table. After a brief examination, Igor's master looks worried. "Things are serious, Igor. Prepare a transfusion." Igor and his master work feverishly, but to no avail. Bob and Betty Hill are no more.

The Hills? deaths upsets Igor's master greatly. Wearily, he climbs the steps to his conservatory, which houses his pipe organ. For it is here that he has always found solace. He begins to play, and a stirring, almost haunting melody fills the house.

Meanwhile, Igor is still in the lab tidying up. As the music fills the lab, his eyes catch movement, and he notices the fingers on Betty Hill's hand twitch. Stunned, he watches as Bob's arm begins to rise! He is further amazed as Betty sits straight up!

Unable to contain himself, he dashes up the stairs to the conservatory. He bursts in and shouts to his master,

"Master, Master! . . . The Hills are alive with the sound of music!"
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