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    Boat 99

    At a boat-rental concession, the manager went to the lake's edge and yelled through his…
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    One Carton and Six Eggs

    This is a story which is perfectly logical to all males: A wife asks her husband, "Could…
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    Even More Musings

    1. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. 2. One nice thing about egotists: They…
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    Deacon's Minutes

    The newly elected secretary for the Deacon Board at church submitted this report:October…
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    Fire Test

    Joey and his classmates had just finished a tour of the local fire hall. Before each…
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    Mule Solution

    A Missouri farmer passed away and left 17 mules to his three sons. The instructions left…
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    Lumberjack

    A man comes up to the owner of a lumberjack business and says, "I need a job and I think…
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    Bare Bones Moving

    The orthopedic surgeon I work for was moving to a new office, and his staff was helping…
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    The Beginning

    When the new patient was settled comfortably on the couch, the psychiatrist began his…
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    Helping Daddy

    One day a young boy ran crying to his mother and rubbing his behind. His mother said,…
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    Vet Visit

    In his younger days our golden retriever Catcher often ran away when he had the chance.…
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    Better Trainer

    A fellow computer programmer for a consulting group had designed some software for one of…
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    Excerpts from A Dog's Diary

    Excerpts from A Dog's Diary:Day number 1808:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!9:30 am…
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    Joining the Church

    After the service a young couple talked to the pastor about joining the church. I hadn't…
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    Honeymoon In England

    On a visit to my wife's native England for our honeymoon, we arrived at London's Gatwick…

A young ensign had nearly completed his first overseas tour of sea duty when he was given an opportunity to display his ability at getting the ship under way.  With a stream of crisp commands, he had the decks buzzing with men and soon, the ship had left port and was streaming out of the channel.

The ensign's efficiency has been remarkable.  In fact, the deck was abuzz with talk that he had set a new record for getting a destroyer under way.  The ensign glowed at his accomplishment and was not all surprised when another seaman approached him with a message from the captain.

He was, however, a bit surprised to find that it was a radio message, and he was even more surprised when he read,

"My personal congratulations upon completing your underway preparation exercise according to the book and with amazing speed.  In your haste, however, you have overlooked one of the unwritten rules -- Make sure the captain is aboard before getting under way."

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