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More Jokes

  • Last Minute Turkey

    Last Minute Turkey

    It's the day before Thanksgiving and the butcher is just locking up when a man pounds on…
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    Homework Excuses

    Excuses to give your teacher when you don't do your homework.- I didn't do my history…
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    How To Know When You Are Ready For Parenthood

    How To Know When You Are Ready For ParenthoodMESS TEST: Smear peanut butter on the sofa…
  • auto mechanic1

    On The Ball Mechanic

    My dad, an auto mechanic, received a repair order that read: "Check for clunking sound…
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    Paying For The Damage

    A motorist driving by a Texas ranch hit and killed a calf that was crossing the road. The…
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    First Salute

    The first salute received by a freshly commissioned Second Lieutenant is always…
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    Vacation Time

    Jill had applied for a job and when she returned home, her mother asked how the interview…
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    Mellowing Mom

    I have five siblings, three sisters and two brothers.One night I was chatting with my Mom…
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    Einstein At A Party

    Albert Einstein arrives at a party and introduces himself to the first person he sees and…
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    Elf Pet Peeves

    ~ Ever since they hit the big time, those Keebler Elves act like we don't exist.~ Santa…
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    Roman Numerals

    One of my college friends asked a group of us for advice on organizing his final report…
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    Ever Driven a Honda?

    A biker is riding a new motorcycle on the highway. While passing a car, he knocks on the…
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    King of The Jungle

    The lion was proud of his mastery of the animal kingdom. One day he decided to make sure…
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    Tournament Weather`

    Our pastor, an avid golfer, was once taking part in a local tournament. As he was…
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    Insurance

    * A lot of life insurance policies cost a great deal of money to maintain. But look on…

Things heard by tech support:

Customer: "I have Microword Soft."

Customer: "Microwave Windows?"

Customer: "Will this upgrade include Microwave 97?"

Customer: (Referring to Microsoft Defrag.) "I ran Microwave Defrost, but it didn't help."

Customer: "I have Microsoft Exploder."

Customer: "I have Microscope Exploiter."

Customer: "I have Netscape Complicator."

Customer: "I have Netscape Regulator."

Customer: "Uhh...I have Newscape and Outlook Exposure."

Customer: "I have a US Robotics Sportscaster modem."

Customer: "It's not my computer that is slow. I have a 200 horse power hard drive."

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