logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

More Jokes

  • Default Image

    Glass Honesty

    As the three ladies picked up a menu, each put on a pair of glasses."I really only need…
  • Default Image

    Temperance River

    A preacher was completing a temperance sermon: with great expression he said, "If I had…
  • leftovers

    Family Pressure

    Three wives were bemoaning their husbands' attitudes towards leftovers: "It gets rough,"…
  • picture of broomstick

    Call Me Leroy

    Uncle Leroy got a job down at the broom factory. On his first day the straw boss (floor…
  • Signs of our Time

    Signs of the Times

    In a veterinarian's office:"All unattended children given free kitten" In the parking lot…
  • Default Image

    Typing Test

    A soldier was asked to report to headquarters for assignment. The sergeant said: "We have…
  • Default Image

    Swindled

    A newsboy was standing on the corner with a stack of papers, yelling, "Read all about it.…
  • Default Image

    Confession

    A young girl once confessed to her priest that she thought she was guilty of the sin of…
  • Default Image

    Military Haircut

    Tiring of the same old buzz haircut from the base barber at Fort Dix, New Jersey, I went…
  • Default Image

    God Will Provide

    A young woman brings home her fiance to meet her parents. After dinner, her mother tells…
  • chickens

    Chickens in the Sack

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one here. There were two…
  • Default Image

    No Frills Airlines

    ...they don't sell tickets, they sell chances. ...all the insurance machines in the…
  • tie

    Tie Conspiracy

    At a clearance sale, the wife of a federal district court judge found a green tie that…
  • Default Image

    Cursing Parrot

    Jimmy received a parrot for his birthday. The parrot was fully grown, with a very bad…
  • Default Image

    Monitors

    I sell new and used computers for a living. At an exhibit and sale, I decided to give…

As ham sandwiches go, it was perfection.  A thick slab of ham, a fresh bun, crisp lettuce and plenty of expensive, light brown, gourmet mustard.  The corners of my jaw aching in anticipation, I carried it to the picnic table in our backyard, picked it up with both hands but was stopped by my wife suddenly at my side.

"Hold Johnny (our six-week-old son) while I get my sandwich," she said.

I had him balanced between my left elbow and shoulder and was reaching again for the ham sandwich when I noticed a streak of mustard on my fingers.
I love mustard.

I had no napkin.

I licked it off.

It was not mustard.

No man ever put a baby down faster.  It was the first and only time I have sprinted with my tongue protruding.
With a washcloth in each hand I did the sort of routine shoeshine boys do, only I did it on my tongue.

Later my wife said, "Now you know why they call that mustard 'Poupon.'"

Powered By JFBConnect