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More Jokes

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    Clunker Leak

    As the owner of a clunker, I was used to dealing with a variety of car breakdowns. One…
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    Waiting For Years

    We had built our dream house some years ago, and furnished it with quality pieces as we…
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    Allleeeee Oooop

    A champion jockey is about to enter an important race on a new horse. The horse's trainer…
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    Economics Exam

    Not expecting to do well on the economics exam, Bill was heartened by the first question:…
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    Wheat Exports

    Not expecting to do well on the economics exam, Bill was heartened by the first question:…
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    Honest Mechanic

    I was worried that my mechanic might try to rip me off, so I was relieved when he told me…
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    Foreign Encounter

    I was trying to get my seventh-grade history class to understand how the Indians must…
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    New Windows Error Messages

    Smash forehead on keyboard to continue. Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue.…
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    Goober In Library

    A goober walked up to the front desk of the library and said, "I borrowed a book last…
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    Ten Commandments

    A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five- and…
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    Wedding Dress Blues

    When my sister Andrea got married, she asked to wear my mother's wedding dress. The day…
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    Find and Replace

    The age of the computer brings much ease and expertise to the preparation of the worship…
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    Psychology Course

    During a phone conversation, my nephew mentioned that he was taking a psychology course…
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    Rest In Peace

    A new business was opening and one of the owner's friends wanted to send him flowers for…
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    Signs You are Broke

    SIGNS YOU ARE BROKE 1. American Express calls and says: "Leave home without it!"2. Your…

Homilies To Live By

Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach that person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and I think, "Well, that's not going to happen."

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

The other night I ate at a real family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.

Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to.

According to a recent survey, men say the first thing they notice about a woman is their eyes, and women say the first thing they notice about men is they're a bunch of liars.

All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

Have you noticed that a slight tax increase costs you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?

There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened.

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