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More Jokes

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    Rest Stop

    I was flying from San Francisco to Los Angeles. By the time we took off, there had been a…
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    Theories Of Cat Behavior

    Theories Of Cat BehaviorLAW OF CAT INERTIAA cat at rest will tend to remain at rest,…
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    Car Moving

    It had been snowing for hours when an announcement came over the intercom: "Will the…
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    Watermelon Mistake

    Discovering too late that a watermelon spiked with vodka had accidentally been served to…
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    Exercise Program

    Here is an exercise program for those of us whose wisdom exceeds our ambition. The doctor…
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    Dance Rejection

    A rather awkward freshman finally got up the nerve to ask a pretty junior for a dance at…
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    What's Good Tonight

    Our family owned restaurant is the setting for many of our discussions about how to…
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    Comments Never Heard at Church

    1. Hey! It's my turn to sit in the front pew. 2. I was so enthralled, I never noticed…
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    Geneology Question

    When my granddaughter, Ann, was 9-years-old, she was given an assignment by her teacher…
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    Tense

    An English teacher at Michigan State University spent a lot of time marking grammatical…
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    Flight Delay Announcement

    A passenger on a Southwest flight says that he once faced a flight delay just before they…
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    Jasper and the Unbaked Yeast Rolls

    We have a fox terrier by the name of Jasper. He came to us in the summer of 2001 from the…
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    Bank Call

    One of my jobs at a bank is to answer the phones and put callers through to the right…
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    Can't Take It With You

    "You just go ahead," the man in the shopping mall said to his wife. "While you're…
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    Still More Bulletin Bloopers

    Several members who have been in the hospital are not on their way to recovery, for which…

Homilies To Live By

Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach that person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and I think, "Well, that's not going to happen."

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

The other night I ate at a real family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.

Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to.

According to a recent survey, men say the first thing they notice about a woman is their eyes, and women say the first thing they notice about men is they're a bunch of liars.

All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

Have you noticed that a slight tax increase costs you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?

There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened.

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