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    Laws of Household Physics

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Old Dr. Carver still made house calls.  One afternoon he was called to the Tuttle house.  Mrs. Tuttle was in terrible pain.

The doctor came out of the bedroom a minute after he'd gone in and asked Mr. Tuttle, "Do you have a hammer?"

A puzzled Mr. Tuttle went to the garage, and returned with a hammer.  The doctor thanked him and went back into the bedroom.

A moment later, he came out and asked, "Do you have a chisel?"

Mr. Tuttle complied with the request.

In the next ten minutes, Dr. Carver asked for and received a pair of pliers, a screwdriver, and a hacksaw.  The last request got to Mr. Tuttle.

He asked, "What are you doing to my wife?"

"Not a thing," replied old doc Carver.  "I can't get my instrument bag open."
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