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More Jokes

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    Three-Sixty 727

    The controller who was working a busy pattern told the 727 on downwind to make a…
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    Ten Ways You Know Your Internet Connection Is A Little Slow

    Ten Ways You Know Your Internet Connection Is A Little Slow1. Text on Web pages displays…
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    Student Driver

    As an instructor in driver education at Unionville-Sebewaing Area High School in…
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    Honeymoon In England

    On a visit to my wife's native England for our honeymoon, we arrived at London's Gatwick…
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    Day Off From School

    On Monday a call came in to the school receptionist. "Hello. Please mark William absent…
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    Actual Newspaper Headlines (collected by journalists)

    1. Something Went Wrong In Jet Crash, Expert Says2. Police Begin Campaign To Run Down…
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    Environ-mental

    My friend Ann and I were eating at a Chinese restaurant. When an elderly waiter set…
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    Isn't Aging Fun?

    Do you realize that the only time in our liveswhen we like to get old is when we're…
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    Pygmy Hunter

    A Hunter walking through the jungle found a huge dead elephant with a pigmy standing…
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    Duck Food

    Duck : Do you have any duck food? Storekeeper: No Duck : Do you have any duck food?…
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    Someone At The Door

    A priest is walking down the street one day when he notices a very small boy trying to…
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    Plus or Minus One

    In a contest in The Washington Post, readers were asked to take an expression using a…
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    Age Advice

    An enormously wealthy 65-year-old man falls in love with a young woman in her twenties…
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    The Cautious Pilot

    Taxiing down the tarmac, a jetliner abruptly stopped, turned around and returned to the…
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    Moving In Motivation

    My engineer husband is meticulous but mild-mannered. While our new house was being built,…

How the Media Would Cover the Apocalypse

USA Today:
WE'RE DEAD

The Wall Street Journal:
DOW JONES PLUMMETS AS WORLD ENDS

Microsoft Systems Journal:
APPLE LOSES MARKET SHARE

Sports Illustrated:
GAME OVER

Wired:
THE LAST NEW THING

Rolling Stone:
THE GRATEFUL DEAD REUNION TOUR

Readers Digest:
'BYE

Discover Magazine:
HOW WILL THE EXTINCTION OF ALL LIFE AS WE KNOW IT AFFECT THE WAY WE VIEW THE COSMOS?

TV Guide:
DEATH AND DAMNATION: NIELSON RATINGS SOAR!

Lady's Home Journal:
LOSE 10 LBS BY JUDGMENT DAY WITH OUR NEW "ARMAGEDDON" DIET!

Inc. magazine:
TEN WAYS YOU CAN PROFIT FROM THE APOCALYPSE

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