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    Newlywed Compromise

    For our first New Year's together as a married couple, my wife offered me a choice of…
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    The Same Taste

    Looking in the mall for a cotton nightgown, I tried my luck in a store known for its sexy…
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    Things I've Learned From My Children

    *Things I've Learned From My Children* 01. A king size waterbed holds enough water to…
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    Hospital Information

    A friend of mine was in the hospital awaiting the arrival of her first child. When I…
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    Van Gogh Family Tree

    After much careful research it has been discovered that the artist Vincent Van Gogh had…
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    Hot Shot Pilot

    A young guy in a two-engine fighter was flying escort for a B-52 and generally being a…
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    CD Sleeves

    My daughter Lili was five when she received a foam CD holder with plastic sleeves for all…
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    Heard By Tech

    Things heard by tech support:Customer: "I have Microword Soft."Customer: "Microwave…
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    Cow Legs

    Did you hear of the little boy who came home from kindergarten with a blue ribbon. When…
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    Funny Answering Machines

    "Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very…
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    Testimony Night

    It was testimony night in the church. A lady got up and said, "We are living in a wicked…
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    Dad and Baby

    One day shortly after the birth of their new baby, the mother had to go out to do some…
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    Maine Vets

    Dr. Cutter is the local Veterinarian, known for his wry humor. He surpassed himself one…
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    Smart Chauffer

    When Albert Einstein was making the rounds of the speaker's circuit, he usually found…

How the Media Would Cover the Apocalypse

USA Today:
WE'RE DEAD

The Wall Street Journal:
DOW JONES PLUMMETS AS WORLD ENDS

Microsoft Systems Journal:
APPLE LOSES MARKET SHARE

Sports Illustrated:
GAME OVER

Wired:
THE LAST NEW THING

Rolling Stone:
THE GRATEFUL DEAD REUNION TOUR

Readers Digest:
'BYE

Discover Magazine:
HOW WILL THE EXTINCTION OF ALL LIFE AS WE KNOW IT AFFECT THE WAY WE VIEW THE COSMOS?

TV Guide:
DEATH AND DAMNATION: NIELSON RATINGS SOAR!

Lady's Home Journal:
LOSE 10 LBS BY JUDGMENT DAY WITH OUR NEW "ARMAGEDDON" DIET!

Inc. magazine:
TEN WAYS YOU CAN PROFIT FROM THE APOCALYPSE

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