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More Jokes

  • Army march joke

    Morning March

    I was a new Army basic trainee at Fort McClellan, and one requirement was a demanding…
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    London Building

    A Texan was taking a taxi tour of London and was in a hurry. As they went by the Tower of…
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    Finishing

    My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So…
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    Goober Guess

    This goober named Jed was walking down the road one day when he came across his friend,…
  • Dog New Year's Resolutions

    Your Dog's New Year's Resolutions

    I will not bark each time I see or hear a dog on TV. I will not steal underwear belonging…
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    Lost and Found

    A police car pulled up in front of grandma Bessie's house, and grandpa got out. The…
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    Subway Drop

    The Manhattan Commuter train was packed. Suddenly there was a jingle on the floor. Most…
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    One Seat Allowed

    A man lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh theater. When the usher came by…
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    Baseball Class

    A professor at the Michigan State University was known for giving boring, cliche-ridden…
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    Nativity Quiz

    A minister is visiting his children to celebrate Christmas. When he walks into the house,…
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    Lost in the Woods

    Two hunters got lost in the woods. The first hunter said, "Don't worry. All we have to do…
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    Scale Pondering

    Two youngsters were closely examining bathroom scales on display at the department…
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    No Rest

    The doctor had just been buried. The last words of the service over, his friends and…
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    More Too Much Coffee

    You know you've been drinking too much coffee when...You can take a picture of yourself…
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    Watch Your Hat and Overcoat

    The crowded cafeteria sported a large sign reading: "Watch Your Hat and Overcoat."Meyer…

How the Media Would Cover the Apocalypse

USA Today:
WE'RE DEAD

The Wall Street Journal:
DOW JONES PLUMMETS AS WORLD ENDS

Microsoft Systems Journal:
APPLE LOSES MARKET SHARE

Sports Illustrated:
GAME OVER

Wired:
THE LAST NEW THING

Rolling Stone:
THE GRATEFUL DEAD REUNION TOUR

Readers Digest:
'BYE

Discover Magazine:
HOW WILL THE EXTINCTION OF ALL LIFE AS WE KNOW IT AFFECT THE WAY WE VIEW THE COSMOS?

TV Guide:
DEATH AND DAMNATION: NIELSON RATINGS SOAR!

Lady's Home Journal:
LOSE 10 LBS BY JUDGMENT DAY WITH OUR NEW "ARMAGEDDON" DIET!

Inc. magazine:
TEN WAYS YOU CAN PROFIT FROM THE APOCALYPSE

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