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More Jokes

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    Let Me Feel Your Pain

    It can buy a house but not a home. It can buy a bed, but not sleep. It can buy a clock…
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    Theories Of Cat Behavior

    Theories Of Cat BehaviorLAW OF CAT INERTIAA cat at rest will tend to remain at rest,…
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    Public Servant Sentence

    "Write a sentence about a public servant," said the teacher. The small boy wrote, "The…
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    New Home No Hears

    Top ten things you don't want to hear from your real estate agent when you go to…
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    Children At The Dinner Party

    During a dinner party, the hosts' two little children entered the dining room totally…
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    Bagel Storm

    It was a terrible night, blowing cold and rain in a most frightful manner. The streets…
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    Grandmother on the Stand

    A small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand in a trial--a…
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    Overworked

    For a couple years I've been blaming it on lack of sleep and too much pressure from my…
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    Next Pastor

    Rev. Jones shocked the congregation when he announced his resignation from the church and…
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    Auction Parrot

    One day a man went to an auction. While there, he bid on a parrot. He really wanted this…
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    Rose Plague

    An elderly parish priest was tending his garden near a convent when a passerby stopped to…
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    29 Ways to Annoy People

    32 Ways To Annoy People 1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17-inch…
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    Husband Chair Feedback

    A young man was sitting next to me in one of the two "husband chairs" in a ladies'…
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    Marriage Proposal

    Some teachers at state universities get to know our students fairly well. One instructor…
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    Stuff You Don't Want To Hear From Tech Support

    *Stuff You Don't Want To Hear From Tech Support*"Do you have a sledgehammer or a brick…

Old telephone books make ideal personal address books.  Simply cross out the names and addresses of people you don't know.

Fool other drivers into thinking you have an expensive car phone by holding an old TV or video remote control up to your ear and occasionally swerving across the road and mounting the curb.

Apply red nail polish to your nails before clipping them.  The red nails will be much easier to spot on your bathroom carpet. (Unless you have a red carpet, in which case a contrasting polish should be selected).

Avoid parking tickets by leaving your windshield wipers turned to fast wipe  whenever you leave your car parked illegally.

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