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More Jokes

  • paper pen

    14 Letters

    Robert and Peter had applied for jobs at a large company and had to take an intelligence…
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    Air Boss

    Activated from the Army Reserves for a joint service Arctic exercise, I was assigned to…
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    Diet Skipping

    Mr. Lee was terribly overweight, so his doctor put him on a diet. "I want you to eat…
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    Deacon's Minutes

    The newly elected secretary for the Deacon Board at church submitted this report:October…
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    Top Ten Things You'll Never Hear A Dad Say

    10. Well, how 'bout that? I'm lost! Looks like we'll have to stop and ask for directions.…
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    Price of Oranges

    Mrs. Goldberg was shopping at a produce stand in her neighborhood. She approached the…
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    You Might Be an Engineer If...

    * You know vector calculus but you can't remember how to do long division.* You chuckle…
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    What The Teacher Says and What She Really Means

    1. Your son has a remarkable ability in gathering needed information from his…
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    One Hard Question

    There was a student who wanted to be admitted to the University.He was smart enough to…
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    Fine Request

    A pickpocket was appearing in court for a series of petty crimes. "Mr. Brewster," the…
  • abstract grey purple

    Art Interpretation

    Liz goes to her first show at an art gallery and is looking at the paintings. One is a…
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    Special Delivery

    It was 6 p.m., and I was about to leave the coin laundry where I was employed. My boss…
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    A Primer For Accordion Beginners

    Get an accordion. The cheaper the better because they all sound the same.Do not tell…
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    Ammunition Substantiation

    An infantry brigade was training in the summer heat, learning methods to counter…
  • bride and groom

    Number Married

    I just read a report that stated that last year 4,153,237 people got married. I don't…

-You wake up face down on the pavement.

-You call Suicide Prevention and they put you on hold.

-You see a "60 Minutes" news team waiting in your office.

-Your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.

-You turn on the news and they're showing emergency routes out of the city.

-Your twin sister forgot your birthday.

-You wake up and discover your waterbed broke and then realize you don't have a waterbed.

-Your car horn goes off accidentally and remains stuck as you follow a group of Hell's Angels on the freeway.

-Your wife wakes up feeling amorous and you have a headache.

-Your boss tells you not to bother to take off your coat.

-You wake up and your braces are locked together.

-You walk to work and find your dress is stuck in the back of your pantyhose.

-You call your answering service and they tell you it's none of your business.

-Your income tax check bounces.

-You put both contact lenses in the same eye.

-The bird singing outside your window is a buzzard.

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