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    Grocery Pickup

    Soon after my 16-year-old sister started working after school as a grocery-store cashier,…
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    Doctor's Advice

    A young man, fresh out of college, went to see his doctor one day. "Doc, there's…
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    Bishop's Role

    We were celebrating the 100th anniversary of our church, and several former pastors and…
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    Car Trip

    Friends took their first-grader on a car trip to Canada. To help pass the time, the boy…
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    Divy It Up

    Mrs. Applebee, the 6th grade teacher, posed the following problem to one of her…
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    Not Likely

    In my sociology class, we were instructed to write down answers to some questions the…
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    Late For Class

    At the prestigious university there was a clear hierarchy that outlined how long one was…
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    Razor Request

    Ronnie goes down to the barber shop. He gets his hair cut and then he is getting a shave.…
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    The Bethelehem Innkeeper's Top 10 Excuses

    Here are the top ten excuses the Bethlehem Innkeeper gave for not giving Joseph and Mary…
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    Chopsticks

    A man having lunch at a Chinese restaurant noticed that the table had been set with…
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    Dear Marty

    Dear Marty, I have been unable to sleep since I broke off your engagement to my daughter.…
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    Company Motivation Posters

    *Company Motivation Posters You Will Never See*1) If you do a good job and work hard, you…
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    The Vet and The Doc

    A veterinarian was feeling ill and went to see her doctor. The doctor asked her all the…
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    Horse Batter

    On the first day of Spring Training, a baseball scout brings a race horse with him to add…
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    Never Be Late

    A local priest was being honored at his retirement dinner after 25 years in the parish. A…

Thought I'd let my doctor check me,

'Cause I didn't feel quite right. . .

All those aches and pains annoyed me

And I couldn't sleep at night.

He could find no real disorder

But he wouldn't let it rest.

What with Medicare and Blue Cross,

We would do a couple tests.

To the hospital he sent me

Though I didn't feel that bad.

He arranged for them to give me

Every test that could be had.

I was fluoroscoped and cystoscoped,

My aging frame displayed.

Stripped, on an ice cold table,

While my gizzards were x-rayed.

I was checked for worms and parasites,

For fungus and the crud,

While they pierced me with long needles

Taking samples of my blood.

Doctors came to check me over,

Probed and pushed and poked around,

And to make sure I was living

They then wired me for sound.

They have finally concluded,

Their results have filled a page.

What I have will someday kill me;

My affliction is OLD AGE

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