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    Insufficient Brain Activity

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    Analogies and Metaphors

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    Essay Woe

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    Mother Tongue

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    Nervous Preacher

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    Kiss The Mirror Good-Bye

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    Battery Life

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    Baseball Doctor

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    Politically Correct Statements

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    Computer Error

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    Signs You've Chosen a "No Frills" Airline

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    Doctor's Advice

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    You Know You're Growing Old When...

    You know you're growing old when... ..you've come to the annoying realization that your…
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    Lose the Cat

    A man hated his wife's cat and he decided to get rid of it. He drove 20 blocks away from…

The day I immigrated to the United States, I was given an alien ID card that featured a cute photo of me at age 15. Years later, when I went to the courthouse to become a citizen, a clerk confiscated my card.

"What will you do with it?" my wife asked.

"We burn it" was the answer.

"Could you please cut the photo off and let us keep it?" asked my wife.

"Certainly not," said the clerk. "This card is official U.S. government property. As such it cannot be mutilated before it's destroyed."

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