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More Jokes

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    Bank Line

    With only two tellers working at the bank, the line I was standing in was moving very…
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    Puppy Power

    Officer Roland, near the end of his shift, noticed a woman driving a small pickup truck…
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    Three Day Silence

    My wife has not spoken to me in three days. I think it has something to do with what…
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    General Motors Help Line

    General Motors doesn't have a help line for people who don't know how to drive, because…
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    The Vet and The Doc

    A veterinarian was feeling ill and went to see her doctor. The doctor asked her all the…
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    Perfect Spouse

    A young lady visited a computer dating service and requested, "I'm looking for a spouse.…
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    Silly Mom

    Thanks to list member Lowell Guebert for sending in this real life, happened to her,…
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    Trojan Virus Warning

    Hey Hector, This was forwarded to me by Cassandra--it looks legit. Please distribute to…
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    Hair Mission

    In dire need of a beauty make-over, I went to my salon with a fashion magazine photo of a…
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    Dream Woman

    A young man called his mother and announced excitedly that he had just met the woman of…
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    Sidewalk Preacher

    A sidewalk preacher stood on a soapbox downtown and started a rousing sermon on…
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    Yosemite Bears

    A married couple was vacationing in Yosemite. The wife expressed her concern about…
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    Letters of Recommendation

    If you have to write a "letter of recommendation" for a fired employee, here are a few…
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    Worthy Cause

    As a traffic safety consultant, I often gave talks on accident prevention. One night…
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    Ladder Borrow

    My next-door neighbor and I frequently borrow things from each other. Not long ago, when…

Pessimist:

If you love someone, Set her free ... if she ever comes back, she's yours, If she doesn't, as expected, she never was

Optimist:

If you love someone, Set her free ... Don't worry, she will come back.

Suspicious:

If you love someone, Set her free ... If she ever comes back, ask her why.

Impatient:

If you love someone, Set her free ... If she doesn't comes back soon forget her.

Patient:

If you love someone, Set her free ... If she doesn't come back, continue to wait until she comes back ...

Playful:

If you love someone, Set her free ... If she comes back, and if you love her still, set her free again, repeat

Animal-Rights Activist:

If you love someone, Set her free ... In fact, all living creatures deserve to be free!!

Lawyers:

If you love someone, Set her free ... Clause 1a of Paragraph 13a-1 in the second amendment of the Matrimonial Freedom Act clearly states that...

Bill Gates:

If you love someone, Set her free ... If she comes back, I think we can charge her for re-installation fees and but tell her that she's also going to get an upgrade.

Statisticians:

If you love someone, Set her free ... If she loves you, the probability of her coming back is high If she doesn't, your relation was improbable anyway.

Schwarzenegger's fans:

If you love someone, Set her free ... SHE'LL BE BACK!

Over possessive person:

If you love someone don't set her free.

HR specialist:

If you love someone set her free by offering her VRS and other benefits then outsource her.

MBA:

If you love someone set her free instantaneously and look for others simultaneously.

Psychologist:

If you love someone set her free. If she comes back her super ego is dominant. If she doesn't come back her id is supreme. If she doesn't go, she must be crazy.

ERP functional expert:

If you love someone set her free. If she comes back, map her into your system. If she doesn't, carry out a gap-fit analysis.

Finance expert:

If you love someone set her free. If she comes back its time to look at fresh loans. If she doesn't, write her off as an asset gone bad.

Marketing Expert:

If you love someone set her free. If she comes back that's brand loyalty.

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