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    Window Savings

    A window salesman phoned a customer. "Hello, Mr. Brown," said the sales rep. "I'm calling…
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    Jogging Time

    A man had been driving all night and by morning was still far from his destination. He…
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    Learned in Yale

    A wealthy contractor liked to know something about all the employees who worked for him.…
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    Ten Commandments

    A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five- and…
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    It Pays to Read Labels

    I finally figured out why I am so "full-figured"!As I was conditioning my hair in the…
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    How to Bathe a Cat

    1. Thoroughly clean the toilet. 2. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet…
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    Football Sleep

    After spending all day Sunday watching football on television, a man fell asleep and…
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    Actual Church Bulletin Bloopers

    (From the Archives back in 1999)1) Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other…
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    Goat for Dinner

    The young couple invited their elderly pastor for Sunday dinner. While they were in the…
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    Dining Out

    The waitress comes over and recognizes the family seated at the table; Mr. & Mrs. Smith…
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    Puppy Love

    For months he had been her devoted admirer. Now, at long last, he had collected up…
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    You Know You've Had Too Much Coffee When

    You Know You've Had Too Much Coffee When . . .* You can type sixty words a minute with…
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    Glass Honesty

    As the three ladies picked up a menu, each put on a pair of glasses."I really only need…
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    Forbidden Words

    An English professor announced to the class, "There are two words I don't allow in my…
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    Mother And Child

    A tiny but dignified old lady was among a group looking at an art exhibition in a newly…

Why do we say something is out of whack?  What is a whack?

If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?

When someone asks you, "A penny for your thoughts," and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why do croutons come in airtight packages?  It's just stale bread to begin with.

When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?

Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car not called a racist?

Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?

Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?

If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make terrible?

Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one?

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language.
Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked and dry cleaners depressed?

Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's"?

Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1 billion stars in the universe you will believe them, but if they tell you a wall has wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?

If people from Poland are called "Poles," why aren't people from Holland called "Holes?"

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