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    All Purpose Excuse Form

    Here is an all purpose excuse form, designed to get you out of the trouble you've gotten…
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    Some Things You Can't Escape

    A convict managed to escape from prison and his escape was the lead item on the six…
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    Electrical Officer

    My daughter is an electrical officer on a carrier. Recently I asked her what her duties…
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    Dangling Participles

    Dangling Participle Alert!~ The burglar was about 30 years old, white, 5' 10", with wavy…
  • A funny conversation between brothers.

    Silly Mom

    Thanks to list member Lowell Guebert for sending in this real life, happened to her,…
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    Eating Out

    Two attorneys went into a diner and ordered two drinks. Then they produced sandwiches…
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    Quit Bothering Us

    We had spent the day moving from our farmhouse into our new house in town. Early the next…
  • a picture of newspapers

    Headlines from 2050

    *Headlines from 2050* Florida to Be Re-admitted to Union Plague of Spotted Owls Threaten…
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    Interview Excerpts

    The following, allegedly, are actual post-interview excerpts collected from middle…
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    Mr. Scwartz

    Mr. Schwartz was the oldest of 7 children, so he had to quit school and work to help…
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    Three-Sixty 727

    The controller who was working a busy pattern told the 727 on downwind to make a…
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    Shower Music

    "Somebody just gave me a shower radio. Thanks a lot. Do you really want music in the…
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    Dewey Check

    I walked into my sister's kitchen and found my nephew, Dewey, having a snack."Where's…
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    Narrow Escape Responses

    There was an engineer, manager, and a programmer driving down a steep mountain road. The…
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    Marine Comeback

    During mail call one evening at Marine Corps boot camp, I received several letters from…

Why do we say something is out of whack?  What is a whack?

If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?

When someone asks you, "A penny for your thoughts," and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why do croutons come in airtight packages?  It's just stale bread to begin with.

When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?

Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car not called a racist?

Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?

Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?

If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make terrible?

Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one?

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language.
Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked and dry cleaners depressed?

Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's"?

Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1 billion stars in the universe you will believe them, but if they tell you a wall has wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?

If people from Poland are called "Poles," why aren't people from Holland called "Holes?"

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