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    Looking For The Lift

    As a concierge at a posh resort, I was often asked about the ski facilities. One day a…
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    Rodentially Clean

    Johnny, age 5, was being taught to be neat and clean and to pick up after himself. One…
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    Jumper

    At the local Starbucks, a little guy exchanged words with a big bald guy and it looked…
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    Are you a Grinch? Test

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    $50 Question

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    Dinosaur Highway

    A goober was taking the tour of a national park not long ago. The ranger mentioned to the…
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    Advertising Terms Explained

    *Advertising Terms Explained*NEW - Different color from previous design.ALL NEW - Parts…
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    Away Messages

    When you are out of the office, here are some away messages to use:1. Thank you for your…
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    Tip Revenge

    A man finds his seat in the theater, but it's too far from the stage. He whispers to the…
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    Zoo Sign

    Although fun to visit, zoos do pose certain perils. But to whom? A sign posted in the…
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    8-Year-Old Asks

    An 8-year-old girl went to her dad, who was working in the yard. She asked him, "Daddy,…
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    Cereal Adjustment

    Deciding to eat healthier breakfasts, my brother-in-law declared that oatmeal would now…
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    Car Moving

    It had been snowing for hours when an announcement came over the intercom: "Will the…
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    Salesman Stop By

    One day a salesman stopped by the Jammer Jones farm, knocked, and Jammer's wife Frannie…
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    Patriotic Father

    On a recent trip to Washington, D.C., my brother-in-law overheard a patriotic father…

A woman had gained a few pounds. It was most noticeable to her when she squeezed into a pair of her old blue jeans. Wondering if the added weight was noticeable to everyone else, she asked her husband, "Honey, do these jeans make me look like the side of the house?"

"No, dear, not at all," he replied, "Our house isn't blue."

He is almost over the cold he caught sleeping in the garage for 3 nights.

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