logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

More Jokes

  • Default Image

    Military Man

    A career military man, who had retired as a Master Sergeant, was telling the new recruits…
  • Default Image

    The Top 15 Lines You'll Never Hear in a Western

    15 "I reckon I'll have me a half-caf double latte with a twist."14 "Gentlemen, rather…
  • Default Image

    Company Motivation Posters

    *Company Motivation Posters You Will Never See*1) If you do a good job and work hard, you…
  • Default Image

    Last Minute Suggestions

    Automotive Gift Suggestions - Just in Time for Last Minute Christmas ShoppingIf you have…
  • Default Image

    Ticket Purchase

    A couple with three children waited in line at San Francisco's Pier 41 to purchase…
  • Default Image

    Good Doctors

    A fellow was asked if there were any good doctors is his home town. "Good doctors!" he…
  • Default Image

    Epitaph

    A doctor wrote about an epitaph he had seen in a local cemetery:"In memory of my father:…
  • Default Image

    A Deeper Problem

    Little Johnny had been bringing his drawings home from kindergarten every day since he…
  • Default Image

    Duck Food

    Duck : Do you have any duck food? Storekeeper: No Duck : Do you have any duck food?…
  • Default Image

    Football Sleep

    After spending all day Sunday watching football on television, a man fell asleep and…
  • picture of army boots

    New Recruit

    As the family gathered for a big dinner together, the youngest son announced that he had…
  • single red_rose

    Memory Clinic

    Two elderly couples were enjoying friendly conversation when one of the men asked the…
  • Default Image

    Sunday Funnies

    One Sunday in a Midwest city a young child was "acting up" during the morning worship…
  • computer keyboard

    I.T. Department Computer Problem Self-Report Form

    *I.T. Department Computer Problem Self-Report Form* 1. Describe your problem:…
  • Default Image

    Need a Pen?

    A patient at the dental office where I was a receptionist stopped by my desk to pay her…

This is an actual job application someone submitted at a McDonald's fast-food establishment........and they hired him!  As what?

1. NAME: Greg Bulmash

2. DESIRED POSITION: Reclining.  Ha ha.  But seriously, whatever's available.  If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.

3. DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package.  If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

4. EDUCATION: Yes.

5. LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

6. SALARY: Less than I'm worth.

7. MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

8. REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

9. HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.

10. PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

11. MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?

12. DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING (UP TO 50 LBS)?: Of what?

13. DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be, "Do you have a car that runs?"

14. HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes.

15. DO YOU SMOKE?: Only when set on fire.

16. WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread.  Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.

17. DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: No, but I dare you to prove otherwise.

Powered By JFBConnect