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    Kids' Instructions for Life

    Never trust a dog to watch your food. Patrick, Age 10 When you want something expensive,…
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    Epitaph

    A doctor wrote about an epitaph he had seen in a local cemetery:"In memory of my father:…
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    Mirror Honesty

    A husband and wife are getting ready for bed. The wife is standing in front of a full…
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    Bosses Night

    At an annual Bosses Night dinner for Helena, Montana, lawyers, sponsored by legal…
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    Lost Bible

    The devout cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the range.…
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    Time Off

    Two factory workers were talking. "I know how to get some time off from work." said the…
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    Chair Test

    An eccentric philosophy professor gave a one question final exam after a semester dealing…
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    Unique Breakfast

    A man observed a sign in the window of a restaurant that read Unique Breakfast, so he…
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    Keep Your Seat

    A radical feminist is getting on a bus when, just in front of her, a man gets up from his…
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    Ask Jeeves

    My 50-something friend Nancy and I decided to introduce her mother to the magic of the…
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    Home Maid Cure

    A business executive injured his leg skiing one weekend. By the time he got home Sunday,…
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    Taste It

    One afternoon a waiter served a bowl of chicken soup to an elderly gentleman. As he…
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    Important Political Decisions

    As a recent high-school graduate, I traveled to our state capitol and got to visit the…
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    The Truth About Tools

    The Truth about Tools HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays…
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    The Vending Machine

    A goober named Laura is at a local zoo and comes across a vending machine, which she has…

For those keyboard jockeys (those with jobs that require sitting at a computer all day) that don't want to spend the money for those fancy exercise machines, here is a little secret for building arm and shoulder muscles. Three days a week works well.

Begin by standing (in your cubicle works well) with a five pound potato sack in each hand extend your arms straight out to your sides and hold them there as long as you can.

After a few weeks, move up to ten pound potato sacks and then fifty pound potato sacks, and finally get to where you can lift a one hundred pound potato sack in each hand and hold your arms straight for more than a full minute.

Next, start putting a few potatoes in the sacks, but be careful not to overdo it.

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