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More Jokes

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    Mother And Child

    A tiny but dignified old lady was among a group looking at an art exhibition in a newly…
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    And Then They Voted

    While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was…
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    Spin the Bottle

    "We used to play spin the bottle when I was a kid. A girl would spin the bottle and if it…
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    Aerobic Dismay

    Concerned about fitness in my middle 40s, I enrolled in an aerobics class. To my dismay I…
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    Guard Dog Sniff

    My boyfriend, Tim, a mechanic, does work for the Air Force Academy. One day, a guard…
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    Morning Run

    The drill sergeant, making his morning announcements to a group of newcomers in a…
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    Takes One To Know One

    Sitting at a table in the clubhouse after a game, Joe said to a fellow club member, "I'm…
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    Interactive Weather

    Our part of the country had gone for weeks with little or no rain. The TV weatherman, on…
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    Last One

    A New Mom took her baby daughter to the supermarket for the first time. She dressed her…
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    Best 'Out of Office' Automatic Email Replies

    1. I am currently out of the office at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to…
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    English Subtitles

    The following are actual English subtitles used in films from Hong Kong. * I am darn…
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    Tech Support Fun

    A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.The tech asked her if…
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    Good Guess

    The Sunday school lesson for the day was about Noah's Ark, so the pre-school teacher in…
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    An Honest Golfer

    About four or five years ago I was standing in a ticket line at LAX, and a fellow in a…
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    Delete Button

    Unfortunately, we humans do not come equipped with delete buttons for our mouths.My…

The best laughs I have known in life have been from my own children.  I have captured rhetorical comments from my children's discussions.  No Pulitzer Prize could ever hold a candle to the notes jotted in this little book in my kitchen.

* "I wonder if the tooth fairy is a boy or a girl."

* "Mom, what is it like being a grown up?  Do you like buying everything you want and giving the kids nothing."

* "Mom, what name did you have when you were a kid?"

* "I wish I had a birthday everyday."

* "If alcohol and cigarettes are bad for you then why did somebody invent them?"

* "Mom, are the friends you had as a kid still alive?"

* "The cat went to the vegetarian to be neutered." "What's neutered?"  "It means he'll come back a girl."

* "What is a pilgrim?" "That's the ones who don't know how to plant corn."

* "Who picked the very first king and queen there ever was?"

* "Mom, when you die, can I be a mom?"

* "I can't swallow anything in my neck because my clams are swollen."

* "Mom, is there only one man in the world for me?  How many are there?  About 30 in each country?"

* "Does God have a nose?"

* "Mom, you're the best mom I ever had."

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