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More Jokes

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    Stuffed Pockets

    A small boy stunned his parents after church one Sunday when he began to empty his…
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    Homework Help

    "Dad," said Little Johnny, "I'm late for football practice. Would you please do my…
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    Check Up

    A man goes to a doctor for a physical checkup.The nurse starts with certain basic items.…
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    Wake Up Call

    An elderly gentleman checked into a New York hotel. The clerk mentioned the phone service…
  • bride and groom

    Number Married

    I just read a report that stated that last year 4,153,237 people got married. I don't…
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    Narrow Escape Responses

    There was an engineer, manager, and a programmer driving down a steep mountain road. The…
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    Wedding Report

    "How did the wedding go?" asked the preacher's wife."Just fine until I asked the bride if…
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    Cell Phone Flight Call

    En route to Hawaii, I noticed one of my passengers in the coach section of the airplane…
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    The friars of Flowers (pun alert)

    Some friars were behind in their belfry payments, so they opened a small florist shop to…
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    Technical Terms for the Strictly Amish

    Log on: making a wood stove hotterLog off: don't add no more woodMonitor: keeping an eye…
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    You Know You Have A Bad Computer When

    You Know You Have A Bad Computer When . . .10. The lower corner of screen has the words…
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    Hospital Regulations

    Hospital regulations require a wheelchair for patients being discharged. However, while…
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    Water Dorm

    When I lived in a dorm, one of the favorite intramural sports was water fights. Dousing…
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    Updated Punishment

    "When I was a youngster," complained the frustrated father, shaking his head, "I was…
  • Last Minute Turkey

    Last Minute Turkey

    It's the day before Thanksgiving and the butcher is just locking up when a man pounds on…
Never trust a dog to watch your food.  Patrick, Age 10
When you want something expensive, ask your grandparents.  Matthew, Age 12
Never smart off to a teacher whose eyes and ears are twitching.  Andrew, Age 9
Wear a hat when feeding seagulls.  Rocky, Age 9
Sleep in your clothes so you'll be dressed in the morning.  Stephanie, Age 8
Never try to hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.  Rosemary, Age 7
Don't flush the toilet when you dad's in the shower.  Lamar, Age 10
Never ask for anything that costs more than five dollars when your parents are doing taxes.  Carrol, Age 9
Never bug a pregnant mom.  Nicholas, Age 11
Don't ever be too full for dessert.  Kelly, Age 10
When your dad is mad and asks you, "Do I look stupid?" don't answer him. Heather, Age 16
Never tell your mom her diet's not working.  Michael, Age 14
Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat.  Joel, Age 12
When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your mom when she's on the phone.  Alyesha, Age 13
Never try to baptize a cat.  Laura, Age 13
Never spit when on a roller coaster.  Scott, Age 11
Never do pranks at a police station.  Sam, Age 10
Beware of cafeteria food when it looks like it's moving.  Rob, Age 10
Never tell your little brother that you're not going to do what your mom told you to do.  Hank, Age 12
Remember you're never too old to hold your father's hand.  Molly, Age 11
Listen to your brain.  It has lots of information.  Chelsey, Age 7
Stay away from prunes.  Randy, Age 9
Never dare your little brother to paint the family car.  Phillip, Age 13
Forget the cake, go for the icing.  Cynthia, Age 8
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