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More Jokes

  • Poorly worded ad causes trouble.

    Sewing Machine Ad

    The following is an ad from a newspaper which appeared four days in a row - the last…
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    Cake Make Up

    On Coast Guard cutters, low-ranking crewmembers take turns in the galley helping the…
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    Materialistic Or What?

    A very successful lawyer parked his brand-new Jag XK-8 in front of the office, ready to…
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    How Can Any Student Pass?

    It's not the fault of the student if he fails, because the year ONLY has 365 days.…
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    Other Uses for Fruitcake

    1. Paint a few white and place them outside on the grass so people won't park on your…
  • law offices

    Lawyer Questions

    The following questions from lawyers (and answers from witnesses) were taken from…
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    Analogies and Metaphors

    These are actual analogies and metaphors found in high school essays.- John and Mary had…
  • A professor's question

    How Old Am I?

    A college professor asked his class a question. "If Philadelphia is 100 miles from New…
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    Red Light - Green Light

    Ralph and his friend were driving through town when they came to a red light. Cruising…
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    Tennis Take On

    A manager has to take on some sport by his doctor so he decides to play tennis. After a…
  • deer hunting jokes

    Deer Hunting

    A group of friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos for the day. That night, one…
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    The English Language

    Lets face itEnglish is a stupid language.There is no egg in the eggplantNo ham in the…
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    Small Town Check

    I had just moved from an apartment to a house in the same small town. One day at the…
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    Clergy Crowd Control

    A young clergyman, fresh out of seminary, thought it would help him better understand the…
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    Pitching Control

    A rookie pitcher was struggling at the mound, so the catcher walked out to have a talk…

Kids statements that are a little... off track:

* God bless America thru the night with a light from a bulb!

* Oh Susanna, Oh don't you cry for me, For I come from Alabama with a band-aid on my knee!

* Give us this day our deli bread! Glory be to the Father and to the Son and to the Whole East Coast.

* We shall come to Joyce's, bringing in the cheese.

* Gladly, the consecrated, cross-eyed bear.

* He carrots for you.

* Yield Not to Penn Station.

* Dust Around the Throne.

* Praise God From whom all blessings flow, Praise Him all creatures, HERE WE GO

* Olive, the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names.

* While shepherds washed their socks by night

* He socked me and boxed me with His redeeming glove.

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