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    The Day Before

    Showing his friend around his home, Fred started to point out all of the collectibles his…
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    Living History Museum

    Marv took his family to visit a living history museum, which included seeing houses and…
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    Charity Answer

    Father O'Shea, the parish priest in the village, was giving a sermon about charity. He…
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    Movie Night

    My wife was complaining that I spend too much time on the computer, and not enough time…
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    Largest Amphibious Assault

    I had been teaching my seventh-graders about World War II, and a test question was, "What…
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    Actual Warnings On Products

    *Actual Warnings On Products* On instructions for a hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.…
  • italian pizza

    Foreign Pizza

    An American businessman goes to Japan on a business trip, but he hates Japanese food, so…
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    Happy Anniversary

    The other day while driving home, after beng delayed at my office, I suddenly saw…
  • A picture of genetically modified corn

    Genetically Modified Food

    Signs that scientists have gone too far with genetically modified food: *Your hot dog…
  • child pray

    Pray Loud

    Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents. At bedtime, the two boys…
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    Soup Objects

    The truck driver looked suspiciously at the soup he had just been served in an eatery. It…
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    Crowded Bus

    It was rush hour, and when the bus finally arrived, it was packed. I tried to force my…
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    Free to Go

    Jon and Amanpreet were in an institution. This place had an annual contest where they…
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    Foul Suspicion

    After the egg hunt on Easter Sunday, the young farm boy decided to play a prank. He went…
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    Military Computer

    Officers at a military installation were being lectured about a new computer. The…
"Minutus cantorum, minutus balorum, minutus carborata descendum pantorum."
(A little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down your pants.)

"Domino vobiscum."
(The pizza guy's here.)

"Sharpei diem."
(Seize the Wrinkled Dog.)

"Motorolus interruptus."
(Hold on, I'm going into a tunnel.)

"Bodicus mutilatimus, unemploymi forevercus."
(Better take the nose ring out before the job interview.)

"Nunc Tutus Exitus Computarus."
(It's Now Safe To Turn Off Your Computer.)

"Tempo Waturim."
(I drove my Ford off a bridge.)

"Litigata Ergo Sum."
(I sue, therefore I am.)

"Et tu, pluribus unum?"
(The government just stabbed me in the back!)

"Cavett Emptor."
(Beware, Dick Cavett could still make a comeback.)
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