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More Jokes

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    Nervous Bride

    Apparently this is a true story. A woman in her forties got married but was bit nervous…
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    Afraid of The Dark

    A little boy was afraid of the dark. One night his mother told him to go out to the back…
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    One Call

    The two teenagers were arrested. The police sergeant told them they were entitled to a…
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    Food Allergy

    Because of an ear infection, my young son, Casey, had to go to the pediatrician. I was…
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    One Hard Question

    There was a student who wanted to be admitted to the University.He was smart enough to…
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    Eye Exam

    Eye-examination charts vary according to the manufacturer, but one thing they have in…
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    What Happened

    "What happened?" asked the hospital visitor to the heavily bandaged man sitting up in…
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    Happy Eggs

    One Sunday morning, while stationed at Osan Air Base in South Korea, I was in line for…
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    Gladys Pun

    There was this lady who was visiting a church one Sunday. The sermon seemed to go on…
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    Holding A Job

    A young man was a very slow worker and subsequently found it difficult to hold down a…
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    The Place for Grace

    When little Johnny received his plate he started eating right away."Johnny wait until we…
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    Three Mothers

    Three mothers are sitting on a park bench talking about (what else?) how much their sons…
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    Heredity

    Father, Mother and their 3 sons, John (the oldest), Mike (middle) and Steve (youngest)…
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    Foreign Languages

    A Swiss guy visited Sydney, Australia, and pulled up at a bus stop where two locals were…
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    Too Distant / Too Close

    The showers in my daughter's dorm turned scalding hot whenever a toilet was flushed. To…
"Minutus cantorum, minutus balorum, minutus carborata descendum pantorum."
(A little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down your pants.)

"Domino vobiscum."
(The pizza guy's here.)

"Sharpei diem."
(Seize the Wrinkled Dog.)

"Motorolus interruptus."
(Hold on, I'm going into a tunnel.)

"Bodicus mutilatimus, unemploymi forevercus."
(Better take the nose ring out before the job interview.)

"Nunc Tutus Exitus Computarus."
(It's Now Safe To Turn Off Your Computer.)

"Tempo Waturim."
(I drove my Ford off a bridge.)

"Litigata Ergo Sum."
(I sue, therefore I am.)

"Et tu, pluribus unum?"
(The government just stabbed me in the back!)

"Cavett Emptor."
(Beware, Dick Cavett could still make a comeback.)
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