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  • crayons

    Cry On for Crayons

    The kindergarten class had settled down to its coloring books. Willie came up to the…
  • jeans

    The Gift That Keeps On Giving

    This is a really long item, but well worth the read! The one present Roy Collette wasn't…
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    Better Preaching

    After the visiting preacher finished, a woman came up and said, "You were much better…
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    Cake Disaster

    Many years ago my just married young cousin moved into an upstairs apartment and invited…
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    Doctor's Orders

    Doctor: "I see you're over a month late for your appointment. Don't you know that nervous…
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    Resurrection Update

    A singing group call "The Resurrection" was scheduled to sing at a church.Everyone was…
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    Computer Career

    Once I worked as an operator on an old IBM 370/Model 138 mainframe at a local college. My…
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    Goober at Interview

    The executive was interviewing a young goober for a position in his company. He wanted to…
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    "If It" Office Advice

    If it rings, answer it. Talk kindly. If it clanks, call the repairman. If it whistles,…
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    Cheap Motel

    One night at an economy motel, I ordered a 6am wake-up call. The next morning, I awoke…
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    Translated Golf

    An American was golfing at the Old Course in St. Andrews, Scotland. He slices his opening…
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    Preaching Assistant

    A minister was called away unexpectedly by the illness of a close family member. He…
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    Let Us Know

    The following advertisement appeared in a physical culture magazine:"Here's a good test…
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    Bell Call

    The scene: Alexander Graham Bell's laboratory.An exciting new discovery is about to take…
  • pharmacist

    Food Allergy

    Because of an ear infection, my young son, Casey, had to go to the pediatrician. I was…
"Minutus cantorum, minutus balorum, minutus carborata descendum pantorum."
(A little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down your pants.)

"Domino vobiscum."
(The pizza guy's here.)

"Sharpei diem."
(Seize the Wrinkled Dog.)

"Motorolus interruptus."
(Hold on, I'm going into a tunnel.)

"Bodicus mutilatimus, unemploymi forevercus."
(Better take the nose ring out before the job interview.)

"Nunc Tutus Exitus Computarus."
(It's Now Safe To Turn Off Your Computer.)

"Tempo Waturim."
(I drove my Ford off a bridge.)

"Litigata Ergo Sum."
(I sue, therefore I am.)

"Et tu, pluribus unum?"
(The government just stabbed me in the back!)

"Cavett Emptor."
(Beware, Dick Cavett could still make a comeback.)
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