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More Jokes

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    Job Search Woe

    Catherine, a RN, was unhappy with her job, so she submitted her resignation. She was sure…
  • bank

    Balance

    I'm not saying that the customer service in my bank is bad, but when I went in the other…
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    The English Language

    Lets face itEnglish is a stupid language.There is no egg in the eggplantNo ham in the…
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    Baggage Problem

    The flight attendant watched a passenger try to stuff his hopelessly overloaded bags into…
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    Cookie Calories

    A husband took his young daughter to the grocery store to help him buy groceries. In…
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    Seatbelt Support

    I was teaching my 6-year-old daughter how to unbuckle her seat belt. She asked, "Do I…
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    Five Kinds of Fruit

    In the middle of the table is a round food tray with five kinds of fruits on it. They…
  • Owl Jokes

    Owl Friend

    Each evening bird lover Tom stood in his backyard, hooting like an owl - and one night,…
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    Skinny Lumberjack

    A large, well established, Canadian lumber camp advertised that they were looking for a…
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    Quarter Rush

    On a busy Friday night at the restaurant where I'd recently started waiting tables, the…
  • Army march joke

    Morning March

    I was a new Army basic trainee at Fort McClellan, and one requirement was a demanding…
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    Favorite Animal

    Our teacher asked us what our favorite animal was, and I said, "Fried chicken." She said…
  • snowman

    Learned From a Snowman

    "All I Need to Know about Life I Learned From a Snowman.... " --It's okay if you're a…
  • man selling tomatoes joke illustration

    Saved by the Tomato

    A story is told of an unemployed man who is desperate to support his family. His wife…
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    First Apartment

    Having moved into his first apartment, our son invited my husband and me for a visit. As…

There is the Law of Gravity - And then, there is the Law of Parenthood

A child's behavior will improve in proportion to the distance she is away from the parent.

Two is equal to two, except when referring to time. Two minutes of tantrum lasts 20 times as long as two minutes of quiet time.

The choice of a preschooler's best friend corresponds directly to the distance the friend lives from your house.

A child's enjoyment of a popular entertainment will be inversely proportionate to the parent's enjoyment.

The chance of a surprise visit by your parents-in-law is directly proportional to the size of the mess in your home.

A child will always eat exactly what she has loved for the past year unless it is the only food in the fridge.

The ease with which a toddler acquires the ability to say a word increases with its likelihood to embarrass a sailor.

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