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    Cub Reporter

    The newspaper editor was instructing the cub reporter in important details of his…
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    Pick of the Crop

    A small boy was looking at the red ripe tomatoes growing in the farmer's garden. "I'll…
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    Tree Trouble

    Unexpected cold snaps had destroyed the buds on my father's young peach tree for two…
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    Top Ten Things You NEVER Want to Hear the Orkin Man Say

    Top Ten Things You NEVER Want to Hear the Orkin Man Say10) "EEEEEKKK!!!!!!"9)…
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    Holding Hands

    While at the mall, I saw an elderly couple holding hands while they were walking. As they…
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    Jasper and the Unbaked Yeast Rolls

    We have a fox terrier by the name of Jasper. He came to us in the summer of 2001 from the…
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    Ten Commandments

    A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five- and…
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    Sharing by Example

    A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin, 5, and Ryan, 3. The boys began to…
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    Newspaper Ads

    **Our experienced mother will care for your child. Fenced yards, meals and smacks…
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    Weight Training

    My grandfather worked in a blacksmith shop when he was a boy, and he used to tell me,…
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    You're not a kid anymore when....

    You're not a kid anymore when....1. You're asleep but others worry that you're dead.2.…
  • bathroom sink

    Bathroom Sign

    Thanks to Norma K. Appel for sending today's CleanLaugh. Dear Pastor Tim, this is a true…
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    Shhhhhh!

    A father had three very active boys. One summer evening, he was playing cops and robbers…
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    Wimpy Dad

    One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her small boy into…
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    Clergy Golf

    Taking advantage of a balmy day in New York, my brother and three other priests swapped…

Okay, you've heard of Murphy's famous Law: Everything that can go wrong will go wrong. Well, there are many other related Laws. Here are some:

After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.

--Lorenz's Law of Mechanical Repair

Identical parts aren't.

--Beach's Law

Any tool, when dropped, will roll into the least accessible corner.

--Anthony's Law of the Workshop

Nothing is as inevitable as a mistake whose time has come.

--Tussman's Law

If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.

--Lowery's Law

The solution to a problem changes the problem.

--Peer's Law

There is no mechanical problem so difficult that it cannot be solved by brute strength and ignorance.

--William's Law

Handy Guide to Modern Science:

1. If it's green or it wiggles, it's Biology.

2. If it stinks, it's Chemistry.

3. If it doesn't work, it's Physics.

Machines should work. People should think.

--IBM's Pollyanna Principle:

The most ineffective workers will be systematically moved to the place where they can do the least damage - management.

--The Dilbert Principle

The first rule of intelligent tinkering is to save all the parts.

--Ehrlich's Law

It is a mistake to allow any mechanical object to realize that you are in a hurry.

--Ralph's Observation

If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire.

--Cannon's Comment

Thinly sliced cabbage.

--Cole's Law

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