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Lesser Known Laws

Okay, you've heard of Murphy's famous Law: Everything that can go wrong will go wrong. Well, there are many other related Laws. Here are some:

After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.

--Lorenz's Law of Mechanical Repair

Identical parts aren't.

--Beach's Law

Any tool, when dropped, will roll into the least accessible corner.

--Anthony's Law of the Workshop

Nothing is as inevitable as a mistake whose time has come.

--Tussman's Law

If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.

--Lowery's Law

The solution to a problem changes the problem.

--Peer's Law

There is no mechanical problem so difficult that it cannot be solved by brute strength and ignorance.

--William's Law

Handy Guide to Modern Science:

1. If it's green or it wiggles, it's Biology.

2. If it stinks, it's Chemistry.

3. If it doesn't work, it's Physics.

Machines should work. People should think.

--IBM's Pollyanna Principle:

The most ineffective workers will be systematically moved to the place where they can do the least damage - management.

--The Dilbert Principle

The first rule of intelligent tinkering is to save all the parts.

--Ehrlich's Law

It is a mistake to allow any mechanical object to realize that you are in a hurry.

--Ralph's Observation

If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire.

--Cannon's Comment

Thinly sliced cabbage.

--Cole's Law

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