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    Mint Mom

    When the U.S. Mint reissued two-dollar bills, I thought they might someday become…
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    Hawaii or Havaii

    These two persons are discussing whether the state of Hawaii is pronounced 'Havaii,' or…
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    Getting Out

    During a field exercise at Camp Lejeune, N.C., my squad was on a night patrol through…
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    49 Cards

    A friend of ours waited until the last minute to send Christmas cards. She knew she had…
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    Sister Cheer Up

    My sister and I are close, and that allows us to be honest with each other. One evening…
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    Senior's Ode to Medication

    A row of bottles on my shelfcaused me to analyze myself.One yellow pill I have to popGoes…
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    Vacation Report

    Christmas Break was over and the teacher was asking the class about their vacations. She…
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    Bulletin Humor

    I hope the bulletin in your church is more accurate than the ones that these occurred in.…
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    Back To School

    After raising 4 kids, and losing one husband, I decided to return to college and get the…
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    Cleaning Instructions

    I bought a great new toilet seat recently.On the label was a suggestion on how to clean…
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    Clean Cup

    Bill and Doug went into a diner that looked as though it had seen better days. As they…
  • picture of bank vault door

    Banking Woes

    The girl came running in tears to her father. "Dad, you gave me some terrible financial…
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    Bar Room Houdini

    A deputy police officer responded to a report of a barroom disturbance. The "disturbance"…
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    Sick Day

    Our local newspaper ran several stories about a study that tied male obesity to a…
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    Found Wallet

    While shopping in a supermarket in Washington, D.C., I heard over the PA system:"A wallet…

If you have to write a "letter of recommendation" for a fired employee, here are a few suggested phrases:

-For the chronically absent:

"A man like him is hard to find."
"It seemed her career was just taking off."

-For the office drunk:
"I feel his real talent is wasted here."
"We generally found him loaded with work to do."
"Every hour with him was a happy hour."

-For an employee with no ambition:
"He could not care less about the number of hours he had to put in."
"You would indeed be fortunate to get this person to work for you."

-For an employee who is so unproductive that the job is better left unfilled:
"I can assure you that no person would be better for the job."

-For an employee who is not worth further consideration as a job candidate:
"I would urge you to waste no time in making this candidate an offer of employment."
"All in all, I cannot say enough good things about this candidate or recommend him too highly."

-For a stupid employee:
"There is nothing you can teach a man like him."
"I most enthusiastically recommend this candidate with no qualifications whatsoever."

-For a dishonest employee:
"Her true ability was deceiving."
"He's an unbelievable worker."

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