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    Goober Horseback Riding

    A goober decides to try horseback riding, even though he has had no lessons or prior…
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    Epitaph

    A doctor wrote about an epitaph he had seen in a local cemetery:"In memory of my father:…
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    Doctor Visit

    A guy walks into a Doctor's office. He has a sausage coming out of his ear, a waffle out…
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    Stuck Between Floors

    Soon after our high-tech company moved into a new building, we had trouble with the…
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    Letter From Mom

    When the man came home, his wife was crying. "Your mother insulted me," she sobbed. "My…
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    Yale Educated

    The bank manager noticed the new clerk was an goober at counting money and adding up…
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    Lawyer Son

    When my mother was called for jury duty, she felt confident of her Ability to answer the…
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    Signs of E-Mail Addiction

    1. You wake up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and stop to check your e-mail on the way…
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    Bathroom Exasperation

    As the lone female in our house, I find that certain male habits have really begun to get…
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    No More Gators

    While sports fishing off Melbourne Beach, a tourist capsized his boat. He could swim, but…
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    Knowing the Numbers

    The teacher asked one of her young students if he knew his numbers."Yes," he said. "I do.…
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    Note From Judge

    During court one busy day, the judge quietly passed the clerk a note reading: "Blind on…
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    Van Problem

    The fist knocking on the door belonged to a cop. Bracing for the worst, the yard foreman…
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    39 And Holding

    A young child asked a woman how old she was. She answered, "39 and holding." The child…
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    Whispering In Church

    A mother took her little boy to church.While in church the little boy said, "Mommy, I…
In Marine Corps basic training, I soon learned that everything we recruits used belonged to our drill instructor.  For instance, she referred to the stuff in our footlockers as "my trash" and to the racks where we slept as "my racks."

One time when when we were all whispering in the bathroom while making "head calls," our drill instructor must have overheard us.

To our surprise, she suddenly yelled, "Why do I hear voices in my head?"
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