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    Signs You Need A New Lawyer

    1. During your initial consultation he tries to sell you Amway.2. He tells you that his…
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    Hypo Teen

    Our neighbor used the word hypochondriac to describe the phase her teen-age daughter was…
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    Cat Prayer

    Cat PrayerNow I lay me down to sleep,I pray this cushy life to keep.I pray for toys that…
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    Top Ten Things You'll Never Hear A Dad Say

    10. Well, how 'bout that? I'm lost! Looks like we'll have to stop and ask for directions.…
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    Amazing Anagrams

    Not strictly humor, but truly amazing....Dormitory = Dirty RoomThe Morse Code = Here Come…
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    24 Pigs

    A young lawyer, just out of Law School, was pleading his first case in South Carolina. A…
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    Cooking Terms

    Tongue: a variety of meat, rarely served because it clearly crosses the line between a…
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    Horse Batter

    On the first day of Spring Training, a baseball scout brings a race horse with him to add…
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    Wake Up!

    A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the…
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    First Sermon

    At his first service, the new preachers sermon was extremely long and dull. As he…
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    PC Assets

    My husband refused to learn how to operate a PC. I tried to get him to realize how…
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    Politically Correct Cat Terms

    Politically correct terms for cat owners: - My cat does not barf hairballs, he is a…
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    Finest Equipment

    Morris had been playing golf for years, and he had the finest equipment, but his…
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    Stain Glass

    An area pastor tells of his first Sunday in the new parish and presenting the children's…
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    Day Off From School

    On Monday a call came in to the school receptionist. "Hello. Please mark William absent…
While reviewing math symbols with my second-grade pupils, I drew a greater-than ( > ) and a less-than sign ( < ) on the chalkboard and asked, "Does anyone remember what these mean?"

A few moments passed, and then a boy confidently raised his hand. "One means fast-forward," he exclaimed, "and the other means rewind!"
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