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    Things My Mother Taught Me

    My Mother taught me LOGIC..."If you fall off that swing and break your neck, you can't go…
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    Enjoyment of Food

    Old Abraham was a poor tailor whose shop was next door to a very upscale French…
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    Healthy Life

    In the smoking-car the conversation turned to the merits and demerits of various ways of…
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    Enemies in the West

    A knight and his men return to their castle after a long hard day of fighting."How are we…
  • woman sleepy

    Sorry I'm Late

    Late one Saturday evening, I was awakened by the ringing of my phone. In a sleepy grumpy…
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    Rolls-Royce Loaner

    When I arrived at a friend's home for a party, my old rattletrap looked pretty shabby…
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    Happy Birthday Call

    A couple phoned a neighbor to extend birthday greetings. They dialed the number and then…
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    Computer Error

    I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Bob the computer guy, to come over.…
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    Liturgical Response

    In our Anglican church, each service begins with a greeting. The officiating clergyman…
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    Great Eyesight

    An old man was a witness in a burglary case. The defence lawyer asked Sam, "Did you see…
  • A Picture of Pastor Tim Davis of Cybersalt

    Pastor Tim as the Dumb Guy

    Three men go on a trip to the desert. One is smart, one is average, and the third is…
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    Grasping Challenge

    When my daughter was about four years old, she still had a hard time grasping the concept…
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    Altar Call

    A minister was planning a wedding at the close of the Sunday morning service.After the…
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    Rest Stop

    I was flying from San Francisco to Los Angeles. By the time we took off, there had been a…
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    Get Me Out

    My husband David's colleague at a package-processing center was trapped in a small rest…

ON DEEP THOUGHTS A day without sunshine is like night.

ON PARADOX AND RETURN POLICIES There is a CD out entitled "The Worst of Jefferson Airplane".  If you buy this, take it home, play it, and enjoy it, should you take it back and demand a refund?

ON MATHEMATICAL TRANSFORMS A polar bear is a rectangular bear after a coordinate transform.

ON PROBLEM SOLVING When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to resemble a nail.-Abraham Maslow ON INFINITY If you had everything, where would you keep it?

ON ECONOMICS The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity.

ON PUBLISHING OR PERISHING "I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top."

English Professor, Ohio University ON REVISIONIST HISTORY What was sliced bread the greatest thing since?

ON DATING When aiming for the common denominator, be prepared for the occasional division by zero.

ON LAMENTATION Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.

ON POETIC LOVE When you're swimmin' in the creek And an eel bites your cheek That's a moray!

Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers ON MODERNISM Q: How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?  A: Two.  One to hold the giraffe and the other to fill the bathtub with brightly coloured machine tools.

ON MATERIAL SCIENCE Character density: The number of very weird people in the office.

ON LITERATURE This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly.  It should be thrown with great force.

Dorothy Parker ON HUMILITY To err is human, to moo bovine.

ON EXPLANATION OF THE END "...  one of the main causes of the fall of the Roman Empire was that, lacking zero, they had no way to indicate successful termination of their C programs." --

Robert Firth ON EXCUSES I can't complain, but sometimes I still do.

Joe Walsh ON NUMBERS Grabel's Law: 2 is not equal to 3---not even for very large values of 2.

ON WORLD POLITICS Diplomacy is the art of saying "nice doggy" until you can find a rock.

AND FINALLY, ON DRUGS AND DEVELOPMENT There are two major products to come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX.
We don't believe this to be a coincidence.

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