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    Lost, Found Changed

    A lady lost her handbag in the bustle of Christmas shopping.It was found by an honest…
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    Turtle Accident

    Two snails were standing on the side of the road, a turtle stopped and said, "Do you guys…
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    Hearing Loss

    A man goes to his doctor and says, "I don't think my wife's hearing is as good as it used…
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    Measuring Hunger

    The parents in our cycling group were discussing the subject of teenagers and their…
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    Who's The Expert?

    On a flight to Florida, I was preparing my notes for one of the parent-education seminars…
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    Employee Gift

    A new pastor, eager to make sure the church's employees would like him, called them…
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    Seatmate Choice

    The plane was only half-full. When an attractive young woman asked if the seat next to…
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    Super Dress

    Shortly after the birth of their second child, a husband offered to take his wife…
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    Goober Grave Readers

    Three goobers, Bubba, Earl and Jeb, were walking home late one night and found themselves…
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    Sign Return

    I was on board the USS Kitty Hawk when we docked in the Sri Lankan capital, Colombo.One…
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    Cruising

    These are true stories from someone who works on a cruise ship.1. (For this one, you have…
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    Goober Travelers

    The following are actual stories provided by travel agents: * I had someone ask for an…
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    Prayer Postions

    Three preachers sat discussing the best positions for prayer, while a telephone repairman…
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    Space Pen

    During the space race of the 60's, NASA decided that they needed a ball point pen that…
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    Finish Paving

    While a friend and I were visiting Annapolis, we noticed several students on their hands…

workshopHammer - In ancient times a hammer was used to inflict pain on one's enemies. Modern hammers are used to inflict pain on oneself.

Pliers - A device used to extend your reach the necessary few inches when you drop a one-of-a-kind screw down behind the new wall it took you two weeks to install.

Multi-Pliers - Contain a handy assortment of sharp and dangerous tools. Best left in its leather sheath and worn on a homeowners belt to increase testosterone levels.

Electronic Stud Finder - An annoying device that never goes off when you point it at yourself.

Halogen Light - A work-light that lights up your backyard with the incandescence of a football stadium, causing you to cast a heavy shadow over the area you're working on so that you need to use a flashlight anyway.

Cordless Drill - A device that lessens your chance of electrocution 90% over a standard plug-in tool.

Cell Phone - The handyman's 911.

Chain Saw - Allows you to cut your way out of the shed that you accidentally built completely around yourself.

Vise Grips - A pair of helping hands that doesn't critique the job you're doing or offer advice.

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