My Dad bought my Mom a piano for her birthday. A few weeks later, I asked how she was doing with it.
"Oh," said My Dad, "I persuaded her to switch to a clarinet."
"How come?" I asked.
"Well," he answered, "because with a clarinet, she can't sing."
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Lost Phone
My girlfriend called me as she was driving to an appointment. She arrived, and I could… -
Dayvorce
A farmer walked into an attorney's office wanting to file for a divorce.The attorney… -
Warning Signs That You Need A New Doctor
*Warning Signs That You Need A New Doctor** The patient before you was a goat.* Instead… -
Signs of Banned Substances
Signs That An Athlete Is Using A Banned Substance:Gets "psyched" before each competition… -
More Bumper Stickers
* FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION! It comes bundled with the software. * I can't dial 911.… -
Big Toe Tingle
A young man, fresh out of college, went to see his doctor one day. "Doc, there's… -
Dental Mommy
For the first time, my four-year-old daughter Kelsey was coming to my office to have me,… -
Funny Quotes
Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.- Red Buttons Did… -
Tea Service
One day my mother was out and my dad was looking after me. I was maybe 2 1/2 years old… -
Military Chat
During the second Gulf War, I was an Air Force colonel. I routinely flew on different… -
One-liners
*43.3% of statistics are meaningless! *Circular Definition: see Definition, Circular.… -
More Cute Kids
On vacation with her family in Montana, a mother drove her van past a church in a small… -
Interview Question
"Now this is the verbal part of your employment test," said the interviewer. "Can you… -
All Roads Lead Back to Rome
The U.S. Standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8.5 inches.… -
More Signs
In the front yard of a funeral home, "Drive carefully, we'll wait." On an electrician's…
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