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More Jokes

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    Even More Musings

    1. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. 2. One nice thing about egotists: They…
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    Modern Potty Training

    Little brother: What do I do now?Big brother: Throw the toilet paper in the toilet.Little…
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    1 in 5

    Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world is Chinese. And there are 5 people in my family,…
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    Wacky Warnings

    Here are the top five winning entries in the Wacky Warning Labels contest, sponsored by…
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    Forgotten Watch

    A man is giving a speech at his lodge meeting. He gets a bit carried away and talks for…
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    Job Search Woe

    Catherine, a RN, was unhappy with her job, so she submitted her resignation. She was sure…
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    More Church Bulletin Bloopers

    Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa will be speaking tonight at Calvary Memorial…
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    Drum Sounds

    A researcher arrives in Borneo to gather data for his thesis. Accompanied by his trusty…
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    Let Us Know

    The following advertisement appeared in a physical culture magazine:"Here's a good test…
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    Beginning School

    Tommy had reached school age. His mother managed with a blast of propaganda to make him…
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    Goober Stewardess

    An airline captain was breaking in a new goober stewardess. The route they were flying…
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    Moving Smith

    Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office."Boss," he says, "we're doing some…
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    Winter in Wisconsin

    It's winter in WisconsinAnd the gentle breezes blow,70 miles per hourAt 52 below! Oh, how…
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    Not Likely

    In my sociology class, we were instructed to write down answers to some questions the…
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    Cat Prayer

    Cat PrayerNow I lay me down to sleep,I pray this cushy life to keep.I pray for toys that…

"If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise" -Unknown

"In dog years, I'm dead." - Unknown

"No animal should ever jump up on the dining room furniture unless
absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation." -- FranLebowitz

"Ever consider what they must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul -- chicken, pork, half a cow.  They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth!" -- Anne Tyler

"I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult." -- Rita Rudner

"You enter into a certain amount of madness when you marry a person with pets." -- Nora Ephron

"In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him." -- Dereke Bruce, Taipei, Taiwan

"Of all the things I miss from veterinary practice, puppy breath is one of the most fond memories!" -- Dr. Tom Cat

"Man is a dog's idea of what God should be." -- Holbrook Jackson

"Things that upset a terrier may pass virtually unnoticed by a Great Dane." - Smiley Blanton

"I've seen a look in dogs' eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts." - John Steinbeck

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