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More Jokes

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    Perley Moore Buys a Truck

    There was a farmer, Perley Moore, who had recently bought a truck and found that the…
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    Vice President of Peas

    Tom was so excited about his promotion to Vice President of the company he worked for and…
  • picture of hurricane evacuation sign route

    Florida Hurricane Advice

    We're about to enter the peak of the hurricane season. Any day now, you're going to turn…
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    Nature Abhors A Simile

    There was something funny about the kidnapping crime scene that Special Agent Frievald…
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    Prescription Check

    An old man strode in to his doctors office and said, "Doc, my druggist said to tell you…
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    Hans Olaffsen's Laundry

    Walking through Chinatown, a tourist is fascinated with all the Chinese restaurants,…
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    Sports Injury

    Giving a man his physical, a doctor noticed several dark, ugly bruises on his shins, so…
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    Goober Line Painter

    A goober who had been unemployed for several months got a job with Public Works. She was…
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    Turkey Poem

    I ate too much Turkey, I ate too much corn,I ate too much pudding and pie.I'm stuffed up…
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    Talking in Your Sleep

    A wife and husband both talked in their sleep. She loved auctions; his hobby was golf.The…
  • Race horses talking in the stable

    Race Horses in a Stable

    Some race horses are staying in a stable when one of them starts to boast about his track…
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    Things You Do Not Want To Hear In Surgery

    1.) Better save that.? We'll need it for the autopsy.2.) Somebody call the janitor -…
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    Turkey Shopping

    It was Christmas Eve in a supermarket and a woman was anxiously picking over the last few…
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    Careful Pulling The Plug

    Out in Kansas, tornadoes often hit with sudden devastation, and without warning. In one…
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    Amish At The Mall

    An Amish boy and his father were visiting a mall for the first time. They were amazed by…

"If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise" -Unknown

"In dog years, I'm dead." - Unknown

"No animal should ever jump up on the dining room furniture unless
absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation." -- FranLebowitz

"Ever consider what they must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul -- chicken, pork, half a cow.  They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth!" -- Anne Tyler

"I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult." -- Rita Rudner

"You enter into a certain amount of madness when you marry a person with pets." -- Nora Ephron

"In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him." -- Dereke Bruce, Taipei, Taiwan

"Of all the things I miss from veterinary practice, puppy breath is one of the most fond memories!" -- Dr. Tom Cat

"Man is a dog's idea of what God should be." -- Holbrook Jackson

"Things that upset a terrier may pass virtually unnoticed by a Great Dane." - Smiley Blanton

"I've seen a look in dogs' eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts." - John Steinbeck

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