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More Jokes

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    Good Guess

    The Sunday school lesson for the day was about Noah's Ark, so the pre-school teacher in…
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    Tea Service

    One day my mother was out and my dad was looking after me. I was maybe 2 1/2 years old…
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    Remember When

    An old couple is sitting in their living room when the old woman leans over and says to…
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    Comedians' Convention

    Someone brought a visitor and the new fellow sat fascinated as the funnymen shouted out…
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    Locked Out

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
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    Thank You Cards

    My first stop on my vacation was my sister's house in Montana. She's extremely organized.…
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    Lost Hunting

    My uncle Joe and his best buddy, Bubba, went hunting a couple of weeks ago. Somehow they…
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    Parenting Tip

    Mary Siegel was almost crazy with her three young kids. She complained to her best…
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    Mike's Girlfriend

    After directory assistance gave me my boyfriend's new telephone number, I dialed him --…
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    Checking In

    Brad and Mike are two old retired widowers who reside close to each other and do constant…
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    Reversal of Fortune

    Dear John, I have been unable to sleep since I broke off our engagement. Won't you…
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    Golf Hole

    A young minister and Mr. Sims, an elderly parishioner, were playing golf. The minister's…
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    Doctor News

    A doctor walked into his office where one of his patients was sitting. The doctor told…
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    Speeding Ticket

    A lady who was speeding had an officer pull her to the side of the road. She didn't have…
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    Weather Forecaster

    To tell the weather, go to your back door and look for the dog. If the dog is at the door…

picture of a car crash"I started to slow down but the traffic was more stationary than I thought."

"I pulled into a lay-by with smoke coming from under the bonnet.  I realized the car was on fire so took my dog and smothered it with a blanket."

Q: Could either driver have done anything to avoid the accident?
A: Travelled by bus?

This Norwich Union customer collided with a cow.  The questions and answers on the claim form were:
Q - What warning was given by you?
A - Horn
Q - What warning was given by the other party?
A - Moo

"On approach to the traffic lights the car in front suddenly broke."

"I didn't think the speed limit applied after midnight"

"I knew the dog was possessive about the car but I would not have asked her to drive it if I had thought there was any risk."

"First car stopped suddenly, second car hit first car and a haggis ran into the rear of second car."

"Windscreen broken.  Cause unknown.  Probably Voodoo."

"The car in front hit the pedestrian but he got up so I hit him again"

"I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment."

"The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intention."

"I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way"

"A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face"

"A pedestrian hit me and went under my car"

"In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole."

"I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home.  As I reached an intersection a hedge sprang up obscuring my vision and I did not see the other car."

"I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident."

"To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front I struck the pedestrian."

"My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle."

"An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished."

"I was thrown from the car as it left the road.  I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows."

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