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More Jokes

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    Shopping On Up

    In a upscale department store, every night at closing time one of our customer-service…
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    Stork Reunion

    A man took his little boy to the zoo for the very first time. Each time they would see a…
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    A Mother's Letter to Her Son

    A Mother's Letter to Her Son My Dear Son: Just a few lines to let you know I'm still…
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    Laws of Parenthood

    There is the Law of Gravity - And then, there is the Law of ParenthoodA child's behavior…
  • doctor4

    Second Opinion

    A woman rushed to see her doctor, looking very worried and all strung out. She rattled…
  • When luggage goes missing.

    Home For The Holidays

    A student was heading home for the holidays. When she got to the airline counter, she…
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    Control and Escape

    The computer company my wife works for distributed a corporate clothing catalogue that…
  • picture of a serious sister

    Chose Your Weapon

    Nine-year-old Aaron came home from the playground with a bloody nose, black eye, and torn…
  • desert negev

    Mummy Shock

    An archaeologist was digging in the Negev Desert in Israel and came upon a sarcophagus…
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    Neighborhood Explosion

    The whole neighborhood shook from the explosion. As shopkeepers ran outside to see what…
  • Amish Law

    Amish Law

    An Amish man answered a knock on his door one morning. An electric company worker handed…
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    Thanks

    A young man was walking through a supermarket to pick up a few things when he noticed an…
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    Waiting For Years

    We had built our dream house some years ago, and furnished it with quality pieces as we…
  • phone help

    Simple Support

    Last week my wife and I purchased a new computer. We ran into some difficulties while…
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    Bloopers in the Media

    "Golden, Ripe, Boneless Bananas, 39 Cents A Pound."- Ad in the "Missoulian" by Orange…

picture of a car crash"I started to slow down but the traffic was more stationary than I thought."

"I pulled into a lay-by with smoke coming from under the bonnet.  I realized the car was on fire so took my dog and smothered it with a blanket."

Q: Could either driver have done anything to avoid the accident?
A: Travelled by bus?

This Norwich Union customer collided with a cow.  The questions and answers on the claim form were:
Q - What warning was given by you?
A - Horn
Q - What warning was given by the other party?
A - Moo

"On approach to the traffic lights the car in front suddenly broke."

"I didn't think the speed limit applied after midnight"

"I knew the dog was possessive about the car but I would not have asked her to drive it if I had thought there was any risk."

"First car stopped suddenly, second car hit first car and a haggis ran into the rear of second car."

"Windscreen broken.  Cause unknown.  Probably Voodoo."

"The car in front hit the pedestrian but he got up so I hit him again"

"I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment."

"The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intention."

"I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way"

"A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face"

"A pedestrian hit me and went under my car"

"In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole."

"I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home.  As I reached an intersection a hedge sprang up obscuring my vision and I did not see the other car."

"I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident."

"To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front I struck the pedestrian."

"My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle."

"An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished."

"I was thrown from the car as it left the road.  I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows."

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