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More Jokes

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    Doctor in the House

    A strained voice called out through the darkened theater, "Please, is there a doctor in…
  • cat lying down

    Politically Correct Cat Terms

    Politically correct terms for cat owners: - My cat does not barf hairballs, he is a…
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    In the Fitting Room

    My girlfriend took her five-year-old daughter shopping with her. The little girl watched…
  • How to be handy around the house - in 10 easy steps.

    Ten Step Guide to Being Handy Around the House

    1. If you can't find a screwdriver, use a knife. If you break off the tip, it's an…
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    Immigrations Card

    Some years ago an Englishman on a plane to Australia was handed one of those…
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    How Does This Work?

    Bob was on vacation, visiting a Las Vegas casino for the first time. He decided to play…
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    PC Assets

    My husband refused to learn how to operate a PC. I tried to get him to realize how…
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    Tax Reform

    At an open conference in Vermont, the state tax commissioner asked the audience which…
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    Window Entry

    A jeweler standing behind the counter of his shop after hours was astounded to see a man…
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    Gated Community

    Security and peace of mind were part of the reason we moved to a gated community. Both…
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    Emergency Flowers

    I stopped at a florist shop after work to pick up roses for my wife. As the clerk was…
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    Pop Rocks

    Cassie was taking two of her Grandsons on their very first train ride from Dayton, Ohio…
  • A joke about two hunters lost in the forest.

    Lost Goober Hunters

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one here. My uncle Joe and…
  • crazy baby

    More Church Bulletin Humor

    *More Church Bulletin Humor* Sermon Outline:I. Delineate your fearII. Disown your…
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    Lost Bid

    Bidding at a local auction was proceeding furiously when the auctioneer suddenly…

* Murphy's First Law for Wives: If you ask your husband to pick up five items at the store and then you add one more as an afterthought, he will forget two of the first five.

* Lerman's Law of Technology: Any technical problem can be overcome given enough time and money.
Corollary: You are never given enough time or money.

* Law of the Search: The first place to look for anything is the last place you would expect to find it.
Corollary: It will not be in the last place you expect to find it.

* Kauffman's Paradox of the Corporation: The less important you are to the corporation, the more your tardiness or absence is noticed.

* The Salary Axiom: The pay raise is just large enough to increase your taxes and just small enough to have no effect on your take-home pay.

* Miller's Law of Insurance: Insurance covers everything except what happens.

* First Law of Living: As soon as you start doing what you always wanted to be doing, you will want to be doing something else.

* Isaac's Strange Rule of Staleness: Any food that starts out hard will soften when stale. Any food that starts out soft will harden when stale.

* Kenny's Law of Auto Repair: The part requiring the most consistent repair or replacement will be housed in the most inaccessible location.

* Second Law of Business Meetings: If there are two possible ways to spell a person's name, you will pick the wrong one.
Corollary: If there is only one way to spell a name, you will spell it wrong anyway.

* The Grocery Bag Law: The candy bar you planned to eat on the way home from the market is hidden at the bottom of the grocery bag.

* Yeager's Law: Washing machines break down only during the wash cycle.
Corollary: All breakdowns occur on the plumber's day off.

* Lampner's Law of Employment: When leaving work late, you will go unnoticed. When you leave work early, you will meet the boss in the parking lot.

* Quile's Consultation Law: The job that pays the most will be offered when there is no time to deliver the services.

* Loftus' Law: Some people manage by the book, even though they don't know who wrote the book or even which book it is.

* Lovka's Dilemma: You never get away, you only get someplace else.

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