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    Goober 911

    Q: Why can't goobers dial 911?A: They can't find the "11" on the phone!
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    College Nerves

    While touring the University with some college-bound friends, I saw an advertisement that…
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    Reversal of Fortune

    Dear John, I have been unable to sleep since I broke off our engagement. Won't you…
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    Pet Hotline

    The Iams Pet Professionals, a team of 30 trained customer service representatives at The…
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    Conductor Problem

    The symphony musicians had little confidence in the person brought in to be their new…
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    The Internet Pledge

    Are you BRAVE enough to take the Internet pledge!!1) I will have a cup of coffee in the…
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    New Medical Technology

    A lady came to the hospital to visit a friend. She had not been in a hospital for several…
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    The Truth About Tools

    The Truth about Tools HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays…
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    Need Help?

    I saw a billboard yesterday that said: Need help? Call Jesus.1-800-555-HELP Out of…
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    Half Diet

    A woman in our diet club was lamenting that she had gained weight. She'd made her…
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    Worker Ants

    The teacher was giving her class of seven-year-olds a natural history lesson. "Worker…
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    Repair Call

    Bill was a frequent user of a pay telephone at a popular truck stop, and was greatly…
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    Van Gogh Family Tree

    After much careful research it has been discovered that the artist Vincent Van Gogh had…
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    Country Puddle

    A man traveling down a country road was forced to stop before a giant puddle covering the…
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    Foot Pill

    A man limped into a hospital to have his foot X-rayed, and was asked to wait for the…
I can see clearly now, the brain is gone...

Mental Floss prevents Moral Decay.

Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.

3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't.

For people who like peace and quiet: a phoneless cord.

If at first you DO succeed, try not to look astonished!

Why is "abbreviation" such a long word?

Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice.

Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
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