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    Ten Minute Wait

    I called to make airline reservations and was put on hold. After several minutes of taped…
  • couple old

    Passing Pain

    An elderly couple are both lying in bed one morning, having just awaken from a good…
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    Goober Border Patrol

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one at:…
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    Movie Impatience

    We went to the movie the other night. I sat in an aisle seat as I usually do because it…
  • suitcases

    Travelling Too Light

    A joke from back in the day when people needed a paper ticket to board an airplane ... A…
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    Shopping On Up

    In a upscale department store, every night at closing time one of our customer-service…
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    Wakeup Fight

    Following an especially angry argument, Mr. and Mrs. Smith went to bed not speaking to…
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    Boris, Bill, & Bill

    Boris Yeltsin, Bill Clinton and Bill Gates were invited to have dinner with God. During…
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    Late Arrival

    A guy shows up late for work. The boss yells "You should have been here at 8:30!"He…
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    Photo Apology

    Photographer Ruth Van Bergen specialized in celebrity portraits. One wealthy woman…
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    Boss Prepared

    As salesman was assigned to secure an important client but failed in his mission.He faxed…
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    Three Gifts

    Three sons left home, went out on their own and prospered. They discussed the gifts they…
  • woman old4

    No Stairs

    An older lady, who lived on the third floor of a boardinghouse, broke her leg. As the…
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    Theme Songs For Bible Characters

    Noah: "Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head" Adam and Eve: "Strangers in Paradise" Lazarus:…
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    Rose Plague

    An elderly parish priest was tending his garden near a convent when a passerby stopped to…
  • Blessed are those who hunger and thirst, for they are sticking to their diets.
  • Life is an endless struggle full of frustrations and challenges, but eventually you find a hairstylist you like.
  • You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
  • One of life's mysteries is how a two pound box of candy can make a person gain five pounds.
  • It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
  • If you can remain calm, you just don't have all the facts.
  • I finally got my head together, and my body fell apart.
  • Time may be a great healer, but it's also a lousy beautician.
  • Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.
  • Age doesn't always bring wisdom.  Sometimes age comes alone.
  • Life not only begins at forty, it begins to show.
  • Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.
  • Sometimes I think I understand everything, then I regain consciousness.
  • If at first you don't succeed, see if the loser gets anything.
  • You don't stop laughing because you grow old; you grow old because you stop laughing.
  • I don't mind the rat race, but I could do with a little more cheese.
  • Amazing!  You just hang something in your closet for a while, and it shrinks two sizes.
  • It is bad to suppress laughter; it goes back down and spreads to your hips.
  • Age is important only if you're cheese or wine.
  • The only time a woman wishes she were a year older is when she is expecting a baby.
  • Freedom of the press means no-iron clothes.
  • Inside some of us is a thin person struggling to get out, but they can usually be sedated with a few pieces of chocolate cake.
  • Can it be a mistake that "STRESSED" is "DESSERTS" spelled backwards?
  • Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.
  • Despite the high cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular?
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