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More Jokes

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    Calling For Technical Support

    Calling For Technical Support (sound familiar?)------------------------------Ring...…
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    Who's the Boss?

    The boss was complaining in our staff meeting the other day that he wasn't getting any…
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    Words Per Day

    Abraham was reading an article out loud to his wife. "Did you know that women use about…
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    New Year's Football vs. Dinner

    As in many homes on New Year's Day, my wife and I faced the annual conflict of which was…
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    Interview Bloopers

    Vice Presidents and personnel directors of the one hundred largest corporations were…
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    Wedding Tears

    During my brother's wedding, my mother managed to keep from crying until she glanced at…
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    Who Said That?

    If quitters never win, & winners never quit, what fool came up with "Quit while you're…
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    Fate

    A young pupil asked, "Master, what is fate.""Ah, my son, it is what has brought great…
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    Goober & Cell Phone

    A young man wanted to get his beautiful goober wife something nice for their first…
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    Tech Support

    Five things you don't want to hear from Tech Support: 1. "Duuuuuude! Bummer!" 2. "In…
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    Granny's Visit

    Little Tony was so happy to see his grandmother that he ran up and gave her a big hug.…
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    Talking Dog

    A guy is driving around Wadsworth, Ohio and he sees a sign in front of a house: "Talking…
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    Collateral

    I accompanied my husband when he went to get a haircut. Reading a magazine, I found a…
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    Navy Shots

    While I'm not sure of the procedure now, when I was in the Navy, every so often, you got…
  • Blessed are those who hunger and thirst, for they are sticking to their diets.
  • Life is an endless struggle full of frustrations and challenges, but eventually you find a hairstylist you like.
  • You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
  • One of life's mysteries is how a two pound box of candy can make a person gain five pounds.
  • It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
  • If you can remain calm, you just don't have all the facts.
  • I finally got my head together, and my body fell apart.
  • Time may be a great healer, but it's also a lousy beautician.
  • Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.
  • Age doesn't always bring wisdom.  Sometimes age comes alone.
  • Life not only begins at forty, it begins to show.
  • Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.
  • Sometimes I think I understand everything, then I regain consciousness.
  • If at first you don't succeed, see if the loser gets anything.
  • You don't stop laughing because you grow old; you grow old because you stop laughing.
  • I don't mind the rat race, but I could do with a little more cheese.
  • Amazing!  You just hang something in your closet for a while, and it shrinks two sizes.
  • It is bad to suppress laughter; it goes back down and spreads to your hips.
  • Age is important only if you're cheese or wine.
  • The only time a woman wishes she were a year older is when she is expecting a baby.
  • Freedom of the press means no-iron clothes.
  • Inside some of us is a thin person struggling to get out, but they can usually be sedated with a few pieces of chocolate cake.
  • Can it be a mistake that "STRESSED" is "DESSERTS" spelled backwards?
  • Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.
  • Despite the high cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular?
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