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More Jokes

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    I'm Not Old - I'm Just Mature

    I'M NOT OLD...JUST MATUREToday at the drugstore, the clerk was a gent.From my purchase…
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    Tired and Thirsty

    Three students are leaving their last classes of the day.The law student is thinking,…
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    September 11 Update

    Dear Cybersalt.org List Members, All Cybersalt.org lists will continue to be silent…
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    Coffee Cool

    I pulled up to the drive-thru of a fast-food restaurant and ordered coffee. I asked the…
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    Signs of Banned Substances

    Signs That An Athlete Is Using A Banned Substance:Gets "psyched" before each competition…
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    Morning Tea

    Little Johnny's father was a pastor in a small church.One day, his father told Little…
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    Come About

    A young man who wants to see the world signs on to a steamship to be trained as a…
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    Economics Exam

    Not expecting to do well on the economics exam, Bill was heartened by the first question:…
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    Carjacking Foiled

    TRUE STORY:Carjacking Foiled:An elderly lady did her shopping and upon return found 4…
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    Nail Biting

    Most of us have a bad habit we are constantly trying to break. For me, it’s biting my…
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    If Bill Gates Owned a Restaurant

    Waiter: Hi, my name is Bill, and I'll be your Support Waiter. What seems to be the…
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    Top Nine Stupid Questions Received by the Chap Stick Hotline

    Top Nine Stupid Questions Received by the Chap Stick Hotline9. "Hi, is this the chopstick…
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    Hot Fishing Spot

    Two goobers go fishing. They catch a lot of fish and return to the shore. 1st goober: I…
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    Cinderella Question

    The tax accountant had just read the story of Cinderella to his four-year-old daughter…
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    Homework Help

    "Dad," said Little Johnny, "I'm late for football practice. Would you please do my…

In the front yard of a funeral home, "Drive carefully, we'll wait."

On an electrician's truck, "Let us remove your shorts."

In a nonsmoking area, "If we see you smoking, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."

On a maternity room door, "Push, Push, Push."

On a front door, "Everyone on the premises is a vegetarian except the dog."

At an optometrist's office, "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."

On a taxidermist's window, "We really know our stuff."

On a butcher's window, "Let me meat your needs."

On a fence, "Salesmen welcome.  Dog food is expensive."

At a car dealership, "The best way to get back on your feet -- miss a car payment."

Outside a muffler shop, "No appointment necessary.  We'll hear you coming."

On a desk in a reception room, "We shoot every 3rd salesman, and the 2nd one just left."

In a veterinarian's waiting room, "Be back in 5 minutes.  Sit!  Stay!"

At the electric company, "We would be delighted if you send in your bill. However, if you don't, you will be."

In a Beauty Shop, "Dye now!"

On the side of a garbage truck, "We've got what it takes to take what you've got."

In a restaurant window, "Don't stand there and be hungry, come in and get fed up."

Inside a bowling alley, "Please be quiet.  We need to hear a pin drop."

In a cafeteria, "Shoes are required to eat in the cafeteria.  Socks can eat any place they want."

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