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More Jokes

  • do not_disturb

    Do Not Disturb

    After a worship service at First Baptist Church in Newcastle, Kentucky, a mother with a…
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    Yellow Canaries

    A lady went to a pet shop."I'd like to buy two yellow canaries," she told the owner."We…
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    Virus Warning!

    WARNING! WARNING! WARNING!IF YOU RECEIVE A GIFT IN THE SHAPE OF A LARGE WOODEN HORSE DO…
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    Bat Delivery

    As the manager of our hospital's softball team, I was responsible for returning equipment…
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    Putting the Cat Out

    A couple is going out for an evening on the town.When they are almost ready to go, the…
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    How Business Communications Work

    How Business Communications WorkMEMORANDUMFrom: Headquarters - New YorkTo: General…
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    What Does That Mean?

    Little Levi attended church for the first time with his buddy, Jimmy. As the pastor got…
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    Tag Fad

    My teenager was headed to school one morning when I told him that the neck tag on his…
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    In My Day

    A young man who was also an avid golfer found himself with a few hours to spare one…
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    The Buck Stops Where?

    A one-dollar bill met a twenty-dollar bill and said, "Hey, where have you been? I haven't…
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    Yard Sale Anger

    A lady was taking her time browsing through everything at a yard sale and said to the…
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    Military Chat

    During the second Gulf War, I was an Air Force colonel. I routinely flew on different…
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    Engineering Dictionary

    *Engineering Dictionary*What the Engineer says (What it really means)A number of…
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    Towel Misunderstanding

    One day a child at my four-year-old's Sunday school class told her classmates that she…
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    Jeep Stuck

    During training exercises, the green lieutenant was driving down a muddy back road. He…

Here are some more strange warnings on items.

On a packet of juggling balls:
"This product contains small granules under 3 millimeters.  Not suitable for children under the age of 14 years in Europe or 8 years in the USA."

Seen on a camera:
"This camera only works when there is film inside."

On a bottle of flavored milk drink:
"After opening, keep upright."

On a can of windscreen de-icing spray:
"Spray works in sub-zero temperatures."

On a can of insect spray:
"Kills all kinds of insects!  Warning: this spray is harmful to bees."

A different brand of insect spray:
"Kills flies, wasps, mosquitoes, midges, and other flying insects.
Not tested on animals."

On an ocean buoy for determining the position of submarines:
"Protect from seawater."

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