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More Jokes

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    The Company Car

    The Company Car...1. It accelerates at a phenomenal rate.2. It has a much shorter braking…
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    A Short History of Medicine

    "Doctor, I have an ear ache."2000 BC - "Here, eat this root."1000 BC - "That root is…
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    Speeding Hymns

    If you MUST speed on the highway, sing these hymns loudly:at 45 mph.... "God Will Take…
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    Give It A Try

    Think of a letter between A and W. Repeat it out loud as you scroll down. Keep going!…
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    Astute Visionaries?

    "Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons."--Popular Mechanics,…
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    Sorting Letters

    Myrddin had gotten a part time job at the Post Office and the supervisor there had been…
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    Waist Deep

    While driving through Buffalo after a heavy snow storm, a motorist noted a cop,…
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    Forbidden Words

    An English professor announced to the class, "There are two words I don't allow in my…
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    What Mom's Really Want

    Top 10 List of what Moms REALLY want...* 10. To be able to eat a whole candy bar (alone)…
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    Goober Vacuum

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
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    Punctuation

    A nearsighted minister glanced at the note that Mrs. Jones had sent to him by an usher.…
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    Free Will

    A young couple came into the church office to fill out a pre-marriage questionnaire form.…
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    Maid Mother

    For all their lives, my three sons have been told they have to do their chores around the…
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    More Bulletin Bloopers

    *More Bulletin Bloopers*The youth group has raised almost $500 for drug…
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    Taxing Cinderella

    The tax adviser had just read the story of Cinderella to his four-year-old daughter for…

Here are some more strange warnings on items.

On a packet of juggling balls:
"This product contains small granules under 3 millimeters.  Not suitable for children under the age of 14 years in Europe or 8 years in the USA."

Seen on a camera:
"This camera only works when there is film inside."

On a bottle of flavored milk drink:
"After opening, keep upright."

On a can of windscreen de-icing spray:
"Spray works in sub-zero temperatures."

On a can of insect spray:
"Kills all kinds of insects!  Warning: this spray is harmful to bees."

A different brand of insect spray:
"Kills flies, wasps, mosquitoes, midges, and other flying insects.
Not tested on animals."

On an ocean buoy for determining the position of submarines:
"Protect from seawater."

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