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More Jokes

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    Overworked

    For a couple years I've been blaming it on lack of sleep and too much pressure from my…
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    Yellow Canaries

    A lady went to a pet shop."I'd like to buy two yellow canaries," she told the owner."We…
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    Knowing About Radios

    One month into Marine Corps training in San Diego, Calif., we were preparing for a…
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    Someone At The Door

    A priest is walking down the street one day when he notices a very small boy trying to…
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    Farewell Luncheon

    The staff at the office where my wife works was hosting a farewell luncheon for a…
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    Dance Rejection

    A rather awkward freshman finally got up the nerve to ask a pretty junior for a dance at…
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    How Hot Is It?

    How hot is it? The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground. The…
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    Lemon-Aid

    A local bar was so sure its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a…
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    Four Little Words

    Heather and Marcy hadn't seen each other in awhile, so they decided to meet for lunch.…
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    Lengthy Discourse

    A visiting minister was very long-winded. Worse, every time he would make a good point…
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    Ticketing Mom?

    Thanks to Kathy Edwards for submitting this true story. She wrote, "Pastor Tim, This…
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    Military Wisdom

    *Military Wisdom*"A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you…
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    One Seat Allowed

    A man lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh theater. When the usher came by…
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    Photo Radar

    A motorist was unknowingly caught in an automated speed trap that measured his speed…
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    Measuring Hunger

    The parents in our cycling group were discussing the subject of teenagers and their…

You know you've been drinking too much coffee when...

You can take a picture of yourself from ten feet away without using the timer.

You get a speeding ticket even when you're parked.

You just completed another sweater... and you don't know how to knit!

You answer the door before people knock.

You have to watch videos in fast-forward.

You ski uphill.

You spend every vacation visiting "Maxwell House."

Juan Valdez names his donkey after you.

You name your dog "Valdez"

You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.

You lick your coffeepot clean!

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