You know you've been drinking too much coffee when...
You can take a picture of yourself from ten feet away without using the timer.
You get a speeding ticket even when you're parked.
You just completed another sweater... and you don't know how to knit!
You answer the door before people knock.
You have to watch videos in fast-forward.
You ski uphill.
You spend every vacation visiting "Maxwell House."
Juan Valdez names his donkey after you.
You name your dog "Valdez"
You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.
You lick your coffeepot clean!