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    Flossing

    As a dental hygienist, I always encourage patients to floss. During one cleaning, the…
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    Goober Flight Lesson

    A goober went to a flight school, insisting she wanted to learn to fly that day. As all…
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    Helping Daddy

    One day a young boy ran crying to his mother and rubbing his behind. His mother said,…
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    Marrying Young

    My sister, went to the department store to check out the bridal registry of our niece…
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    More One-liners

    I can see clearly now, the brain is gone... Mental Floss prevents Moral Decay. Madness…
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    Free Paper

    My dry cleaner very generously gives each customer a free copy of the daily newspaper. As…
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    Canine Complex

    A man walked into the office of the eminent psychiatrist Dr. Heidberg, and sat down to…
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    Bathroom Break

    On the first day of school, about mid-morning, the kindergarten teacher said, "If anyone…
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    Dog Barking Payback

    A wife and her husband are lying in bed listening to the next door neighbor's dog. It has…
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    Pessimistic Friend

    An avid duck hunter was in the market for a new bird dog. His search ended when he found…
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    Jogging Time

    A man had been driving all night and by morning was still far from his destination. He…
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    Catfish Fishing

    Jim had an awful day fishing, sitting on the lake all day without a single bite. On his…
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    Applause

    A famous football coach was on vacation with his family in Maine. When they walked into a…
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    Hearing Request

    During a January revival an evangelist asked the people in line what they needed.One…
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    God Will Provide

    A young woman brings home her fiance to meet her parents. After dinner, her mother tells…

There was something funny about the kidnapping crime scene that Special Agent Frievald couldn't quite place, and the thought stuck with him throughout the rest of the day, like those tiny little bits of the circumferent skin from the bologna slices on a foot-long Subway Cold Cut Trio that get stuck in between the last two molars on the upper left, on the tongue side where you can't possibly reach them with a toothpick, your fingernails, or even a systematically straightened paper clip, they just sit there and make everything you eat at your next meal taste vaguely like vinegar and mayonnaise, and then somehow -- quietly but miraculously -- they disappear by themselves in the middle of the night while you're asleep, just like the visiting Countess appeared to have done.

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