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More Jokes

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    Who Said That?

    If quitters never win, & winners never quit, what fool came up with "Quit while you're…
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    Buffalo Comments

    Two buffalo were standing on the range when a passing tourist said, "Those are the…
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    The Half Cake Diet

    A woman in our diet club was lamenting that she had gained weight.She'd made her family's…
  • paramedics doll

    Doll Play

    Toward the end of our senior year in high school, we were required to take a CPR course.…
  • woman old3

    Not Going to Church

    One Sunday morning, a mother knocks on her son's bedroom door and tells him it's time to…
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    Grocery Pickup

    Soon after my 16-year-old sister started working after school as a grocery-store cashier,…
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    Fore!

    My five-year-old nephew wanted to caddy for my brother's golf game. "You have to count my…
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    Airline Announcements

    Occasionally, airline attendants make an effort to make the "in-flight safety lecture"…
  • horses times 2

    Horse Woes

    Two cowboy friends, Wally and Dallas, each bought a horse one summer. They enjoyed riding…
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    Zoo Thank You

    As a volunteer who conducts educational tours of the Zoo, Sally occasionally receives…
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    Priceless Grandparent Stories - Part 2

    6. A Sunday school class was studying the Ten Commandments. They were ready to discuss…
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    Missing The Obvious

    One day a diver was enjoying the aquatic world 20 feet below sea level. He noticed a guy…
  • eye examiner

    Eye Test Chart

    When his eyes began to give him trouble, a man went to a ophthalmologist in Prague. The…
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    Approval Letter

    After trying a new shampoo for the first time, Dewey mailed off an enthusiastic letter of…
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    Trouble At The Zoo

    Three mischievous boys went to the zoo one day for an outing, since they had been at…

New Axioms of the Nineties

1. Home is where you hang your @.
2. The e-mail of the species is more deadly than the mail.
3. A journey of a thousand sites begins with a single click.
4. You can't teach a new mouse old clicks.
5. Great groups from little icons grow.
6. Speak softly and carry a cellular phone.
7. C:\ is the root of all directories.
8. Pentium wise; pen and paper foolish.
9. Don't put all your hypes in one home page.
10. The modem is the message.
11. Too many clicks spoil the browse.
12. The geek shall inherit the earth.
13. A chat has nine lives.
14. Don't byte off more than you can view.
15. Fax is stranger than fiction.
16. What boots up must come down.
17. Virtual reality is its own reward.
18. Modulation in all things.
19. A user and his leisure time are soon parted.
20. Know what to expect before you connect.
21. Oh, what a tangled website we weave when first we practice.
22. Speed thrills.

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