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More Jokes

  • snake

    Car 34

    A young man is an avid listener to the city's police frequency, and he leaves the scanner…
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    Translated Golf

    An American was golfing at the Old Course in St. Andrews, Scotland. He slices his opening…
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    New Windows Error Messages

    Smash forehead on keyboard to continue. Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue.…
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    Unwise Application Lines

    Readers of the Washington Post were asked to compose a very unwise line for a college…
  • dog ball

    Excerpts from A Dog's Diary

    Day number 180 8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY…
  • man large2

    Sick Day

    Our local newspaper ran several stories about a study that tied male obesity to a virus.…
  • sick

    Sick Days

    It was the toughest experience of my life. First, I got angina pectoris and then…
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    Emergency Flowers

    I stopped at a florist shop after work to pick up roses for my wife. As the clerk was…
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    Mrs. Pierpoint

    A woman is worried about an older woman, a widow, who lives in the apartment next door.…
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    Interactive Weather

    Our part of the country had gone for weeks with little or no rain. The TV weatherman, on…
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    Casual Day

    I used to work for a large company, they often did special things for us to make work a…
  • office write

    Job Interview

    Reaching the end of a job interview, the human resources person asked a young engineer…
  • map forest

    Wilderness Guide

    "We pass this way but once," we have heard it said. But my wife has learned that, unless…
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    Mommy Test

    I was out walking with my then 4 year old daughter. She picked up something off the…
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    Reasons Not To Wash

    If you took the same excuses that people use for not going to church and apply them to…

New Axioms of the Nineties

1. Home is where you hang your @.
2. The e-mail of the species is more deadly than the mail.
3. A journey of a thousand sites begins with a single click.
4. You can't teach a new mouse old clicks.
5. Great groups from little icons grow.
6. Speak softly and carry a cellular phone.
7. C:\ is the root of all directories.
8. Pentium wise; pen and paper foolish.
9. Don't put all your hypes in one home page.
10. The modem is the message.
11. Too many clicks spoil the browse.
12. The geek shall inherit the earth.
13. A chat has nine lives.
14. Don't byte off more than you can view.
15. Fax is stranger than fiction.
16. What boots up must come down.
17. Virtual reality is its own reward.
18. Modulation in all things.
19. A user and his leisure time are soon parted.
20. Know what to expect before you connect.
21. Oh, what a tangled website we weave when first we practice.
22. Speed thrills.

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