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More Jokes

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    Golf Survey

    My job as a land surveyor took me to a golf course that was expanding from 9 holes to 18…
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    62nd Birthday

    My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday. He asked me how old I…
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    Professional Animal Trainer

    As a professional animal trainer, I was disturbed when my own dog developed a bad habit.…
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    New Car Warning

    A husband, the owner of a new car, was somewhat reluctant to allow his wife to drive his…
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    Razor Request

    Ronnie goes down to the barber shop. He gets his hair cut and then he is getting a shave.…
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    Dun in Texas

    A cowboy (named Julius?) rode into town and stopped at the saloon for a drink.…
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    Goober Diagnosis

    A Goober felt sick and decided to go to the doctor. The doctor examining him said, 'Well,…
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    Hybrid Car

    My uncle in Detroit tried to make a new kind of car. He took the engine from a Ford, the…
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    Left Behind

    "You just go ahead," the man in the shopping mall said to his wife. "While you're…
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    Three Legged Chicken

    A man was driving along a rural road one day when he saw a three legged chicken. He was…
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    More Insurance Claims

    "I started to slow down but the traffic was more stationary than I thought." "I pulled…
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    I Hope I'm Sick

    A fellow was sitting in the doctor's waiting room, and said to himself every so often,…
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    Prayer Positions

    Three ministers sat discussing the best positions for prayer while a telephone repairman…
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    Hymns For The Aging

    *Hymns for the Aging* Precious Lord, Take my Hand (And Help Me Get Up) It is Well with My…
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    Cat Joke

    A man runs into the vet's office carrying his dog, screaming for help. The vet rushes him…

...they don't sell tickets, they sell chances.

...all the insurance machines in the terminal are sold out.

...before the flight, the passengers get together and elect a pilot.

...if you kiss the wing for luck before boarding, it kisses you back.

...you cannot board the plane unless you have the exact change.

...before you took off, the stewardess tells you to fasten your Velcro.

...the Captain asks all the passengers to chip in a little for gas.

...when they pull the steps away, the plane starts rocking.

...the Captain yells at the ground crew to get the cows off the runway.

...you ask the Captain how often their planes crash and he sez, "Just once."

...no movie. Don't need one. Your life keeps flashing before your eyes

...you see a man with a gun, but he's demanding to be let off the plane.

...all the planes have both a bathroom and a chapel

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