logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

More Jokes

  • couple elderly

    I'm Dead

    A husband and wife, both getting on in years, are in bed one morning. He takes her hand,…
  • Default Image

    Restroom Use Policy

    FROM: Human Resources DepartmentSUBJECT: Restroom Use PolicyIn the past, employees were…
  • Default Image

    Address Change

    My friend called his car insurance company to tell them to change his address from Texas…
  • Default Image

    Take Two Instead

    A man takes a photo of the front of his house to the local copy store and asks the clerk…
  • Default Image

    Birthday-Anniversary

    A man entered a stationery store and asked the clerk for a 'birthday/anniversary card.'…
  • Default Image

    Electrical Officer

    My daughter is an electrical officer on a carrier. Recently I asked her what her duties…
  • Default Image

    Factory Supplies

    At the end of my factory shift, I was asked to purchase some supplies. The machines'…
  • child pray

    Pray Loud

    Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents. At bedtime, the two boys…
  • Default Image

    Farming Dream

    The school of agriculture's dean of admissions was inter-viewing a prospective student,…
  • Default Image

    Babysitting Reference

    We encouraged our 18-year-old daughter to find a job to help pay for her college…
  • Default Image

    Work Show and Tell

    Stopping to pick up my daughter at kindergarten, I found out that the topic of show and…
  • Default Image

    Incapacitated

    I was recovering from surgery when a charity representative phoned asking me to take part…
  • Default Image

    The Tie

    A man goes into a restaurant and the waitress stops him."Sorry sir, you need to wear a…
  • Default Image

    Ah, Newlyweds

    There are never any secrets! A young couple decided to wed. As the big day approached,…
  • Default Image

    Cake Baking for Mom's of Small Children

    Cake Baking for Mom's of Small Children Preheat oven, get out utensils and ingredients.…

1. Well, this day was a total waste of make-up.
2. Make yourself at home! Clean my kitchen.
3. Who are these kids and why are they calling me Mom?
4. Don't bother me. I'm living happily ever after.
5. I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.
6. I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.
7. If I throw a stick, will you leave?
8. You! Off my planet!
9. Therapy is expensive, poppin' bubble wrap is cheap! You choose.
10. Practice random acts of intelligence & senseless acts of self-control.
11. Bottomless pit of needs & wants.
12. Friendly checkout clerk. Thanks for keeping me that way!
13. If I want to hear the pitter patter of little feet, I'll put shoes on my cat.
14. Does your train of thought have a caboose?
15. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
16. And your cry-baby whiny opinion would be...?
17. I'm not crazy, I've just been in a very bad mood for 30 years.
18. If only you'd use your powers for good instead of evil...
19. See no evil, hear no evil, date no evil.
20. A PBS mind in an MTV world.
21. Allow me to introduce my selves.
22. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
23. Whisper my favorite words: "I'll buy it for you."
24. Better living through denial.
25. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
26. Suburbia: where they tear out the trees & then name streets after them.
27. Adult child of alien invaders.
28. I'm just working here till a good fast-food job opens up.
29. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
30. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
31. Stress is when you wake up screaming & you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.
32. Here I am! Now what are your other two wishes?
33. I can't remember if I'm the good twin or the evil one.
34. Don't worry. I forgot your name, too!
35. Adults are just kids who owe money.
36. I work 40 hours a week to be this poor.
37. Can I trade this job for what's behind door #2?
38. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
39. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
40. Chaos, panic, & disorder - my work here is done.
41. Ambivalent? Well, yes and no.
42. Is it time for your medication or mine?
43. I plead contemporary insanity.
44. And which dwarf are you?
45. I refuse to star in your psychodrama.
46. I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
47. How do I set a laser printer to stun?
48. Meandering to a different drummer.
49. I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.

Powered By JFBConnect