logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

Out-of-Office Replies

computer keyboardI don't know about you, but I find those "Out-of-the-Office" e-mail auto-replies very ordinary and tedious. Here are some fun alternatives:

1. Thank you for your e-mail. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.

2. Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks.

3. Due to a transporter malfunction, I am now in the 24th century, and I don't know when I'll be back. But hey, leave a message. Someone might get to it.

4. In case of a business emergency, I may be reached 24 hours a day at (insert Pointy-Haired Boss's cell phone number here).

5. The e-mail server is unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try sending again.

6. Please reply to this e-mail so I will know that you got this message.

Powered By JFBConnect

More Jokes

  • man8

    Choruses vs Hymns

    A young, new Christian went to his local small town church one weekend. He came home and…
  • money stack

    AMAP

    The interviewer examined the job application then turned to the prospective employee. "I…
  • Default Image

    Stuck Between Floors

    Soon after our high-tech company moved into a new building, we had trouble with the…
  • man6

    Ticket Purchase

    A couple with three children waited in line at San Francisco's Pier 41 to purchase…
  • Default Image

    Moon Cheese

    For centuries, people thought the moon was made of green cheese.Then the astronauts found…
  • card

    Birthday Heart Attack

    Realizing at the last minute that it was his father's birthday, a teenage boy rushed to…
  • Default Image

    Blind Date

    After being with his blind date all evening, the man couldn't take another minute with…
  • class2

    Foreign Encounter

    I was trying to get my seventh-grade history class to understand how the Indians must…
  • Default Image

    Ever Driven a Honda?

    A biker is riding a new motorcycle on the highway. While passing a car, he knocks on the…
  • Default Image

    Strawberry Fertilizer

    A farmer was driving along the road with a load of fertilizer. A little boy, playing in…
  • Default Image

    Wallet Tip

    Leaving a plush night club one evening, a miserly gentleman walked past the doorman…
  • Default Image

    My Dog At It

    A minister delivered a sermon in ten minutes one Sunday morning. That was about half the…
  • deer

    Hunting Prayer

    The Wednesday-night church service coincided with the last day of hunting season. Our…
  • Default Image

    Goober Mom Writes Goober Son

    Dear Son, I am writing slow because I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we…
  • Default Image

    Weddings and Funerals

    Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling…