logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

Parenthood

If it was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labor!

Shouting to make your children obey is like using the horn to steer your car, and you get about the same results.

The smartest advice on raising children is to enjoy them while they are still on your side.

Avenge yourself ~~~ live long enough to be a problem to your children.

The best way to keep kids at home is to give it a loving atmosphere ~~ and hide the keys to the car.

Parents: People who bear infants, bore teenagers, and board newlyweds.

The joy of motherhood: What a woman experiences when all the children are finally in bed.

Life's golden age is when the kids are too old to need babysitters and too young to borrow the family car.

Any child can tell you that the sole purpose of a middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

Grandparents are similar to a piece of string ~ handy to have around and easily wrapped around the fingers of grandchildren.

There are three ways to get something done: Do it yourself, hire someone to do it, or forbid your children to do it.

Adolescence is the age when children try to bring up their parents.

Cleaning your house while your kids are at home is like trying to shovel the driveway during a snowstorm.

Oh, to be only half as wonderful as my child thought I was when he was small, and half as stupid as my teenager now thinks I am.

There are only two things a child will share willingly:  communicable diseases and his mother's age.

Adolescence is the age at which children stop asking questions because they know all the answers.

An alarm clock is a device for awakening people who don't have small children.

More Jokes

  • Default Image

    Signs You Need A New Lawyer

    1. During your initial consultation he tries to sell you Amway.2. He tells you that his…
  • Default Image

    Wake Up!

    A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the…
  • Default Image

    Sorting Letters

    Myrddin had gotten a part time job at the Post Office and the supervisor there had been…
  • Default Image

    Station Help

    An elderly man was standing in front of the ticket office in Grand Central Station. A…
  • Default Image

    A Job Worse Than Yours

    The San Francisco Zoo has an elephant named Calle who has a chronic illness, requiring…
  • Default Image

    Threatening Letters

    The fellow stormed into the postmaster's office in a fury. "I've been getting threatening…
  • man glasses

    Age Question

    A college professor asked his class a question. "If Philadelphia is 100 miles from New…
  • Default Image

    Car Privileges

    David and Bernice had just given their teenage daughter family-car privileges. On…
  • Default Image

    ESP Banking

    Tired of having to balance his wife Cindy's checkbook, Mike made a deal with her; he…
  • Default Image

    Bible Confusion

    The little girl was sitting with her grandmother, who had presented her with her first…
  • Default Image

    Bosses Night

    At an annual Bosses Night dinner for Helena, Montana, lawyers, sponsored by legal…
  • leftovers

    Family Pressure

    Three wives were bemoaning their husbands' attitudes towards leftovers: "It gets rough,"…
  • Default Image

    Signs You've Chosen a "No Frills" Airline

    You can't board the plane unless you have the exact change. Before you take off, the…
  • Default Image

    Sister Repair

    My sister has the courage, but not always the skills, to tackle any home repair project.…
  • Default Image

    Always Corrected

    Frustrated at always being corrected by my hubby, I decided the next time it happened I…