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    Immigrations Card

    Some years ago an Englishman on a plane to Australia was handed one of those…
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    First Words

    The eight-year old boy had never spoken a word-ever. One afternoon, as he sat eating his…
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    Typing Test

    A soldier was asked to report to headquarters for assignment. The sergeant said: "We have…
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    Math Symbols

    While reviewing math symbols with my second-grade pupils, I drew a greater-than ( > ) and…
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    School Excuse

    At the school where my mother worked, the two first-grade teachers were Miss Paine and…
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    Dear Milkman…

    Dear Milkman..."Dear Milkman, I've just had a baby, please leave another one.""Please…
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    Goober Travel Times

    A Goober gets on a bus and asks the driver how long the trip is between Limerick and…
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    Secret Of Life

    A woman walking down a residential street, noticed a little old man rocking in a chair on…
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    Solid to Gas

    Some time ago, I was taking a ground school class for private pilots. During the sessions…
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    Speeding Excuses

    Philadelphia's Highway Patrol officers hear all kinds of creative excuses that drivers…
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    Talking in Your Sleep

    A wife and husband both talked in their sleep. She loved auctions; his hobby was golf.The…
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    Fish Heads

    A customer at Green's Gourmet Grocery marveled at the proprietor's quick wit and…
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    Politically Correct Football

    The Politically Correct National Football League would like to announce its name changes…
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    Neighborhood Explosion

    The whole neighborhood shook from the explosion. As shopkeepers ran outside to see what…
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    Thoughts on Golfing

    A "gimme" can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers, neither of whom can…

A pastor was leaving his area and was saying farewell to his congregation at the Church doors for the last time. He shook the hand of an elderly lady as she walked out. She said "Your successor won't be as good as you."

"Nonsense", said the pastor, in a flattered tone.

"No, really", said the old lady, "I've been here under five different ministers and each new one has been worse than the last."

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