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More Jokes

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    Flight Attendant Trivia

    To pass the time while our plane was being de-iced, the flight attendants played a trivia…
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    Deli Tax Return

    The owner of a small deli was being questioned by the IRS about his tax return. He had…
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    911 Sees All

    Part of my job as a 911 dispatcher is to interrogate callers who are in various states of…
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    Diet Skipping

    Mr. Lee was terribly overweight, so his doctor put him on a diet. "I want you to eat…
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    Toaster Oven

    One of my daughter's wedding presents was a toaster oven. Soon after the honeymoon, she…
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    Car Privileges

    David and Bernice had just given their teenage daughter family-car privileges. On…
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    Job Search Woe

    Catherine, a RN, was unhappy with her job, so she submitted her resignation. She was sure…
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    Slow Train

    A passenger train is creeping along, slowly. Finally it creaks to a halt. A passenger…
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    40 Year Difference

    When I was a 20-something college student, I became quite friendly with my study partner,…
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    Camping Hints

    When using a public campground, a tuba placed on your picnic table will keep the…
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    Goober Operator

    My daughter called me at work to say I was to phone Ian at my bank. When I called, the…
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    College Laundry

    My son Mark was only 5 feet, 8 inches tall when he left for college in the fall. He…
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    Prescription

    A man goes to the doctor and tells him that he hasn't been feeling well. The doctor…
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    Where did I come from?

    One day our Little niece Rita went up to her mother and asked, "Mom, where did I come…
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    Give and Take

    All eyes were on the radiant bride as her father escorted her down the aisle. They…

After classical violinist Fritz Kreisler was invited to a society party, the hostess urged, "Of course, you'll bring your violin."

"In that case," Kreisler said, "my performing fee is two thousand dollars."

Insulted (or caught out), the woman huffed, "In that case, I shall ask you not to mingle with my guests."

"In that case," Kreisler replied, "my fee will only be one thousand dollars."

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