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More Jokes

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    Flight Booking

    After booking my 80-year-old grandmother on a flight from Florida to Nevada, I called the…
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    Marrying Young

    My sister, went to the department store to check out the bridal registry of our niece…
  • compact fluorescent_bulb

    Politically Correct Light Bulb

    "How many politically-correct people does it take to screw in a light-bulb?" "Look, I…
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    Scavenger Hunt

    A woman answered her front door and saw a little boy holding a list. "Ma'am," he…
  • train station

    Large Party

    On one occasion William Howard Taft, in his work as an attorney, took a train to…
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    Tree Trouble

    Unexpected cold snaps had destroyed the buds on my father's young peach tree for two…
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    Dog Breeding Made Absurd

    ~ Pointer + Setter = Pointsetter, a traditional Christmas pet ~ Kerry Blue Terrier + Skye…
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    Tired Mom

    I had put in an 18-hour day at work and was upset to find my four-year-old Zack asleep in…
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    Talking Surprise

    On a hot summer day, a farmer and his dog were riding in a wagon pulled by two horses.…
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    First Things First

    Bob had finally made it to the last round of the $64,000 Question. The night before the…
  • chickens

    Crate of Chickens

    The farmer's son was returning from the market with a crate of chickens his father had…
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    Horse Looking

    One day a man passed by a farm and saw a beautiful horse. Hoping to buy the animal, he…
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    A Bear, a Lion and a Pig

    A bear, a lion, and a pig meet. I know what your thinking they eat the PIG...NOThe bear…
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    Plane Seat

    It was Judi's first plane trip.Boarding the aircraft she settled into a window seat in…
  • office woman

    Control Seminar

    The company I work for sometimes puts on what they call "Lunch and Learn" seminars during…

Good News: You baptized seven people today in the river.
Bad News: You lost two of them in the swift current.

Good News: The Women's Guild voted to send you a get-well card.
Bad News: The vote passed by 31-30.

Good News: The Elder Board accepted your job description the way you wrote it.
Bad News: They were so inspired by it, they also formed a search committee to find somebody capable of filling the position.

Good News: You finally found a choir director who approaches things exactly the same way you do.
Bad News: The choir mutinied.

Good News: Mrs.  Jones is wild about your sermons.
Bad News: Mrs.  Jones is also wild about the "Gong Show", "Beavis and Butthead" and "Texas Chain Saw Massacre."

Good News: Your women's softball team finally won a game.
Bad News: They beat your men's softball team.

Good News: The trustees finally voted to add more church parking.
Bad News: They are going to blacktop the front lawn of your parsonage.

Good News: Church attendance rose dramatically the last three weeks.
Bad News: You were on vacation.

Good News: Your deacons want to send you to the Holy Land.
Bad News: They are stalling until the next war.

Good News: Your biggest critic just left your church.
Bad News: He has been appointed the Head Bishop of your denomination.

Good News: The youth in your church come to your house for a surprise visit.
Bad News: It's in the middle of the night and they are armed with toilet paper and shaving cream to "decorate" your house.

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