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    Corporate Can-Do

    Programmer to Team Leader:"We can't do this proposed project. **CAN NOT** It will involve…
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    What is Marketing?

    What is Marketing?You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say, "I am…
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    Dog Barking Payback

    A wife and her husband are lying in bed listening to the next door neighbor's dog. It has…
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    Legal Contracts

    The professor of a contract law class asked one of his better students, "If you were to…
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    Vacation Ride

    While vacationing in Alberta, Canada, my husband and I went horseback riding. Before the…
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    You and Your Boss: The Subtle Differences

    If you take a long time, you're slow. But if your boss takes a long time, he's thorough.…
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    Quiz Query

    My daughter's 5th-grade class had been studying astronomy.One morning at breakfast she…
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    Coffee Choices

    In our home we tend to get the children to help out. One day our youngest son came in to…
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    Verbalized Prayers

    The pastor of a mid-sized church decided one Monday morning that the staff would…
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    Newcomer Court

    "Your Honor, I want to bring to your attention how unfair it is for my client to be…
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    City Kids Camping

    Two boys from the city were on a camping trip. The mosquitoes were so fierce the boys had…
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    Norma Findlay in Room 302

    A sweet grandmother telephoned St. Michael's Hospital. She timidly asked, Is it possible…
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    Flight Instructions

    During a business trip to Boeing's Everett, Washington factory, I noticed several 747 and…

Good News: You baptized seven people today in the river.
Bad News: You lost two of them in the swift current.

Good News: The Women's Guild voted to send you a get-well card.
Bad News: The vote passed by 31-30.

Good News: The Elder Board accepted your job description the way you wrote it.
Bad News: They were so inspired by it, they also formed a search committee to find somebody capable of filling the position.

Good News: You finally found a choir director who approaches things exactly the same way you do.
Bad News: The choir mutinied.

Good News: Mrs.  Jones is wild about your sermons.
Bad News: Mrs.  Jones is also wild about the "Gong Show", "Beavis and Butthead" and "Texas Chain Saw Massacre."

Good News: Your women's softball team finally won a game.
Bad News: They beat your men's softball team.

Good News: The trustees finally voted to add more church parking.
Bad News: They are going to blacktop the front lawn of your parsonage.

Good News: Church attendance rose dramatically the last three weeks.
Bad News: You were on vacation.

Good News: Your deacons want to send you to the Holy Land.
Bad News: They are stalling until the next war.

Good News: Your biggest critic just left your church.
Bad News: He has been appointed the Head Bishop of your denomination.

Good News: The youth in your church come to your house for a surprise visit.
Bad News: It's in the middle of the night and they are armed with toilet paper and shaving cream to "decorate" your house.

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